Raya do

So… Raya dah nak habis.

Aku kononnya nak cerita sangat pasal tragedy kelakar bangat sebelum Raya tak pun cerita-cerita sampai sekarang. The mood for that story dah hilang dah… Hehhe…

Last week we invited Kamil’s past and presents colleagues datang rumah for raya. Because aku tak puas makan ketupat palas and kuah kacang (I am a kuah kacang person… rendang doesn’t do that much for me…) I served that together with kawan2nya ketupat and rendang, plus laksa Penang and the usual Minestrone soup with crusty baguette (I really should start making other type of soups sebab satgi orang boring mai rumah aku…. Nak buat mushroom soup leceh lak.. Nak kena blend soup tu at the end….).

Mum made some meehoon goreng sebab takut tak cukup buuutt…. Aku ni segan lak nak serve it to my guests sebab pernah sekali when I was small, aku dengar orang bersembang pasal menu at a party and “biasalah kat Malaysia ni birthday party mesti ada meehoon goreng…” was mentioned. And dah lama-lama spaghetti Bolognese was mentioned alongside meehoon goreng. So sebab takut orang boring, aku akan cuba elakkan from serving these 2 dishes. Tapi Kamil keluarkan jugak sebab Mummy’s meehoon goreng is his favourite. Sekejap je habis pulak. Soo…. orang dah tak boring dah lah kot…. Haha.

I also made chocolate cup cakes and caramel congo bars which one of my staffs tapau-ed home for his family. Mana mamat tu dapat tupperware Allahualam because I definitely didn’t give it to him. I also baked marble cheesecake and of course chocolate and vanilla tarts. Must reduce the eggs when I next whip out a batch of them vanilla creams.

Alhamdullilah the guests didn’t come in droves but they arrived in batches so we weren’t super busy and had time to talk and sit down with the guests.

My boss came with his lovely, lovely family. Before that Kamil’s Dutch boss arrived right on the dot and I shook his hand saying, “How marvelously mat salleh of you to come on time..” just to make Kamil a little anxious. I suspect that he is a bit nervous when I am in the same vicinity of his bosses as he knows I like to tease.

My aunt and uncle came all the way from Perak so yeay ! I was happy and Kamil was grateful.

We have taken out the humongous table from the library and put it in the kitchen instead as the kitchen table kan dah pi ke patio. The light green table made a wonderful working table, what with its size and girth. I placed a two seater and a long backless bench in the library to fill the space, laid out an old carpet and voila ! a much cosier library materialized. During the makan-makan, we left the side door opened and it was sooo nice in there, what with the wind and the rustling of the leaves from the rambutan tree just outside the room.

Sooo nice…. Especially considering that I didn’t have to spend any money to furnish the new addition to the house as expected. Well… maybe I have to re-upholster some of it. Shouldn’t be too expensive.

My guests prayed in the library and when my aunt and my cousins were in the room, I saw them baring-baring sambil sembang-sembang and they looked peaceful and tranquil… and oh perasannya aku.

Anyway, it was a nice makan-makan. Food tak banyak yang tinggal and my guests stayed for quite awhile to lepak and just enjoy themselves. Kamil’s boss stayed for almost 2hours which was nice. Kamil’s aunt and her family also stayed for quite some time, bergossip berbagai with his sister sambil gelak-gelak. One of Kamil’s ex-staff siap mandikan anak lagi. I am glad that people are comfortable in my home.

Masalahnya we didn’t take any pics. Sayang….

Cerita pendek hari raya... cerita panjang.. Sat na....

Selamat Hari Raya ! Maaf zahir dan batin.

It has been awhile since I wrote. And I do want to write, especially about just before raya and raya itself buuutt... I thought it would be nicer with pics. Buuuttt the pics are only available via Facebook and... apparently you can't copy from Facebook and paste it elsewhere.

So really right now I am waiting for my very inefficient sister to pass me the pics.

As usual, pagi raya with the ILs. Then around 12 baru le dapat aku balik rumah mak... like 5 minutes away. Second year in a row I ajak Kamil balik kampung dia and dua kali jugaklah dia tak nak.

So what to do ? Ikut my sister balik Seremban. Hehe....

Malam we visited Bab and Mami Ela and it was really fun sebab my cousin Zaf is back from Dubai. It had always been such a pleasure talking to him, especially since he and my husband both adore each other so they talked a mile a minute. Ada je benda nak cerita.

Second day, pagi-pagi lagi aku cabut balik Perak. Best.... And as usual, aku pegi solo sebab my other family members cannot bergerak pagi2 one.

Best kat Perak. At one relative's house we were served Mee Kari Ketam. Terangkat segala apa benda yang boleh diangkat. Kita orang tension sebab dok memikio macamana le masak benda alah ni. Macam masak mee kari biasa ke ?

My aunt punya lah curious sebab esok pagi when we woke up, tu dia... Mee Kari Ketam for breakfast. Berebut kita orang makan. Menjadi, buutt... kurang manisnya. Maybe they had better ketams than my aunt.

And oleh sebab itu juga, I will try to make some this Saturday.

Tunggu ya for the verdict.

Anyway we had wanted to stay for 2 nights. By 4 pm dah angkat bag dah... dah kat pintu dah kita orang pun... But punyalah busy bersembang, when I looked at the watch dah pukul 6 !

So Kamil said, toduq sajalah lagi satu malam. "You okay ke ?"

You asking me ? Of course le aku okay. Rumah my family maaa ?

Happy !!!

Anyway, yesterday Mom called to announce the death of my aunt in Kedah. My dad's sister-in-law, mom of my 4 cousins. Terkejut gak because we didn't know. Patut le mom ajak balik Kedah but she didn't tell us why. Kita orang malas le pulak nak balik because the very loooong journey.

Anyway, I am quite sad that we didn't go. I simply can't. Berguling atas lantai boss aku kalau aku ambik cuti lagi..

Dah malam baru my cousin teringat nak sms all his cousins. Aku tak perasan pun until my other cousin called around midnight to ask. Sian. Aku tak mau kacau that is why I didn't call. Busy kan ? Tengah sedih kan... Tak yah lah aku kacau.

Anyway, dah tak ramai dah menakan aku up north. Most of us are here so aku kesian jugak ngan depa. Tapi I am sure adik-beradik belah Arwah ada to offer help.

Takpelah. Maybe next week aku balik utara to check up on my poor uncle. My Tok Cik pun meninggal kat rumah depa. So I can use the opportunity to visit her grave jugak.

Al-fatihah for Mak Arah, yek ?

Thanks.

Today's ramblings

Soooo patio ku dah siap... Hehehhe...

Siap bayar pun so ... selama beberapa tahun aku akan dok sengap-sengap sebab pulus is gone...

I have taken pictures but bluetooth on this computer has gone wonky so I can't upload yet at the moment. This morning we huffed and puffed the kitchen dining table there and it is okay. The one that is not okay as I have predicted is the very empty space in the kitchen.

Hmmm....

So now tinggal nak bawak turun the day bed. And of course items to buy. And boy they are quite extensive.

1. 2 single seaters
2. Tiffany lamp (I refuse to have any other type)
3. Side table
4. Fresh new sheets for the day bed

Alamak... So .. ehm, ehm... kalau hangpa mai don't be shocked if my patio is empty... Banyaknya nak belanja !

Anyway, the ceiling fan in our upstairs family room rosak and has not been working for quite some time. When the electricians came to sort out the patio, I asked them to look at the fan and voila ! in no time, dah elok.

But the kids didn't know it and imagine their surprise when Abang accidently switched it on, it rotated. "Mummy ! The fan is working again !" I rounded up the stairs to see my children in agog. Heheh...

"What did you do ?"

"I dunno.. I just turn it on !"

So... here we go.

"This is really a miracle of Ramadhan ! Itu lah korang prayed and prayed and suddenly it repaired on its own !"

Abang still held his surprise and wonder face. Adik's pulak has turned to confusion and a bit sceptical.

"Itulah, what ever we do dalam dunia ni, kita kena mintak dekat Allah.. blah, blah, blah...*sermon* .... blah, blah... *lecture*...."

And while aku dok syok sendiri bersyarah, Adik leaned to Abang and said, "Saya tak pernah pun doa for the kipas to work...."

Abang shrugged and I just had to stop. No point anymore kan ?

Heheh... dah besar dah... Mummy tak boleh nak pull their legs dah.

Merepek lagi..

To say that I am tensed in really an understatement. But how else can you say it, yeah ? I have so many, many things running in my head oftentimes aku tak leh nak filter those yang real and yang merepek. Heheh..

Today, my ex-boss ajak berbuka with him. Actually it should be quite a big do with the rest of our ex-team tapi aku kan… I just didn’t get around inviting everybody. Tengok-tengok dah Monday, the day of our supposed buka and he sms-ed to ask kat mana kita buka.

Err…. heheh…

Thus I have to buka with him today.

Aku bukan tak nak. I have a very good relationship with him still. But, aku nak terawikh, that is all. Especially akhir-akhir Ramadhan ni rasa macam tak cukup aje ibadat, macam ibadat aku just like any normal days. Somehow I have always felt that ibadat during Ramadhan must be extra special.

And tolong berebut dengan ibadah for the hours and minutes of Ramadhan is nostalgia. Ramadhan also is the month of keluar malam-malam shopping for Raya, dengar lagu-lagu Raya while looking for baju kurung and what nots. And thus ada sedikit susah nak accommodate all that from 8pm (dah selesai buka) to 10pm (kedai semua dah katup pintu). Aku kan very nostalgic. I need to re-visit things that are familiar to me sebab tu 2 nights before Raya karang baru kami nak kemas rumah Mummy. Kalau malam sebelum Raya tu karang baru Mummy sibuk nak jahit curtains lagi best. The more kelam-kabut it gets, the happier I will be just so that I could re-capture the Raya of my youth.

And that is why I am contemplating to try and pujuk Mummy to masak ketupat atas unggun api like we used to. Don’t think Mum will agree sebab habis rosak rumput dia but.. I wouldn’t know until I try, kan ? I will definitely be baking cakes (butter, chocolate and marbled cheese). Although my choices of cakes has evolved somehow (used to be butter, fruit and apple cakes only).

Anyway, I have always worried about my future Rayas, when I am old and grey and anak-anak dah besar. Anak aku dua. Kalau dua-dua balik kampong mertua, sapa nak Raya dengan aku, ek ? Kalau gilir-gilir pulak, then I will never ever Raya dengan both of my children. Tak ke haru ?

Tambahan pulak that day my big boss asked my colleague on the number of her children which is an impressive 6. When I answered 2 he went, “Why aren’t you more productive ? Later on during Raya, only 2 come home and that is it ?”, shouting out my fears out loud for all and sundry to see.

But I calmly answered that I have 8 siblings and all live in Shah Alam so I still have my siblings and nieces and nephews that will visit me, eventhough I am not confident with that statement, really.

Balik tu, kebetulan CY berbuka at home so aku ceritalah the conversation with my boss, hinting like mad that she and her kids must ensure that my future Rayas would not be empty. Nasib baik dia jawab, “Jom lah kita Raya rumah Mummy lagi… kumpul kat sana ramai-ramai nak ? Adik-beradik pun jadilah….”

Lega. That is why my friends, make sure we live amongst our family and jangan gaduh adik-beradik, okay ? Because not all of us can afford 6 kids.

Aku demam pulak

Sooo…. Aku demam ni.

I didn’t even know it until I stepped into my house and almost collapsed. It was such a busy day at work, I was overly stressed and stretched almost to the limit. I didn’t even perasan the frogs in my throat and the aching body until I collapsed on the sofa.

Mom tak sempat masak so she bought pizza. Okaylah. Luckily she made tenggiri masak taucu and there are leftovers of fucuk and suhun masak lemak so I tapau-ed that for sahur.

I didn’t even make an attempt for terawikh as I didn’t think I could even last solat Isyak.

I told Adik to follow her Tok for terawikh but she said, “But I want to be with you, Mummy……..” Awww….. I was sooo touched, the dull pain on my body temporarily slipped my mind. Temporary aje lepas tu rasa balik.

So by 9 I was already asleep and when Kamil woke me up for soq, I was shocked with the intensity of the pain in my throat and head. It was rather agonizing. Menggagau jugak turun bawah (much more careful nowadays when I tackle them stairs), sakit-sakit tekak pun belasah jugak nasi because I was soooo hungry then I popped a few Panadols and tried to go back to sleep.

Tried is the operative word. How can I sleep when Abang came in squeezed all of his mass between Adik and me, and Adik was sleeping on my shoulder tu. Lepas tu he could not lie still and kept moving and…well, aku redha ajelah.

Boss took one look at me and commented how knackered I looked. I must be more poorly than I thought I was if my exhaustion can be seen underneath all those paint I have started to apply on my face.

And my cuti could not come fast enough….

Sigh………….

Untuk raya... sekejaaaappppp aje...

Last night I had a berbuka puasa do with an orphanage organised by the company. I didn't want to go but boss forced me to so terpaksa jugaklah pergi.

The main reason I didn't want to go was the orphans sebab ... I know I would be crying buckets as soon as my eyes clapped on them.

Surprise, surprise I didn't though. Maybe on account my boss was sitting next to me. But looking at the whole lot of them, so young, so unbelievingly gorgeous, so innocent aku sebak sangat but had to keep them all inside sebab ... well... malu le kat boss.

Anyway, the food was rather good but luckily I didn't have to pay for them sebab I ate like soooo little. Rugi aje. Actually this year, I didn't go to any buffets at all. I know it will be wasted and the exorbitant sum they charge, aku rasa macam rugi sangat. RM50 is too expensive for me already.

Anyway, kebetulan when my colleagues and I did our Maghrib, the orphans were in the surau too and it was such a touching moment for me. I kept grabbing those that were near me asking, "Boleh tak peluk makcik sekejap ?"

Many were willing and it was such a nice feeling to see them shyly but eagerly returned my hugs.

One little girl, so painstakingly adorable in blue tudung, raised her hand happily when I asked, "Sapa nak peluk makcik ni ?" and she ran and jumped on me and the hug she gave me was so tight. Ayaq mata memang mengalir dan dan tu jugak. Then she got up and 5 minutes later she came to me again, arms wide saying, "Saya nak peluk" and so I put her on my lap and I hugged and pinched her cheeks and well.. loved her.

They looked well fed, with nice clothes and well taken care of. But my worry had always been if they get enough hugs, and kisses (I kiss children with my nose), and sweet words thrown at them plus a tickle or two. Itu aje sebab those are the things that children really need.

I asked her name and it was soooo long, pening kepala aku. I asked if I can take her home for raya and the teacher said probably I can because her mom usually doesn't want to take her home. Her father passed away and her mom is an Indonesian that is unable to care for her. But from the looks of it, is not really bothered with her pun.

So I will try. I am gonna try and bring her home for raya and bawak balik kampung.

Insya-Allah.

How to review reports

Cara-cara nak review report staff anda

Step 1

Cuba baca tengok. Don't judge first. Do not think about the grammar mistakes and whatever dark and insidious lurking between the words.

Step 2

Take a deep breath and try to stem your anger. Re-read again, slowly this time eventhough you know changing the speed level is not going to help much.

Step 3

It is better for you to tackle the grammar and vocabulary first before you do the context because sometimes, things do get clearer when everything is fixed nicely. Oh, you might need to get the offender to sit next to you so that you can ask him to explain what is the meaning of all that ****.

Step 4

Ignore his/her sheepishness. It will definitely come as soon as your 3rd correction.

Step 5

Surpress whatever pity you have for him/her by your 10th "What do you mean by this ?" because if you do, they will inadvertantly feel relaxed and will never ever learn. You will be their English teacher forever and ever and ever if you do this (my daughter certainly thinks I am one because of my red pen and angry mutterings while I read them reports !!)

Step 6

Once you delved into their heads and finally understood what he/she was trying to say, read it again to assess the quality of their field work.

Step 7

Explain to them carefully what is missing and ask them to try and 'beef' up the report. Worst case, you have to send them to do field work again.

Step 8

Review them reports again. You are allowed to sigh and shook your head if mistakes are made again. Challenge the contents. Ask them to provide proof of whatever they are saying. Send them away to repair whatever that needs repairing.

Step 9

At this stage you are allowed to cry if things are still not right.

Step 10

Grit your teeth if the aesthetics of the report is not taken care of. Or horrors upon horror if there are still mistakes and errors and points that are without evidence and merit. Point it out to them and ask them clean it up. Again.

Step 11

If the report is still not satisfactory, ask for a soft copy. Once you get the damn thing, do it yourself. Something that you should have done really by Step 4.

Merepek bulan Ramadhan

Cuti aku hari ni...

Sebab aku juga cuti tang lain, aku dok berangan tak mau bangun soq sebab... well what for right ? Tapi Abang asked oh so politely if I can whip up some pancakes for soq, so... terpaksa jugaklah bangun.

Because cuti, the kids tak tiduq as usual after soq. Depa pi bantai tengok telly in my room.. Adik entah kenapa suka sangat series Thin Blue Line, a British series with Mr Bean in it. Jadi police officer siap. Anyway, mengekek-ngekek lah budak2 ni gelak2 sampai menganggu my very much needed slumber. So I chased them out of the room but since my sleep was already disturbed, I couldn't seem to achieve REM.

Bangun and veg in front of the telly while checking on the contractors buat my patio.

Can I just say that it is looking gorgeous, my patio ? Depa tak letak bumbung lagi, baru ada frame bumbung and it is already so damn pretty ! I was contemplating of letting it be like that, no need bumbung... But.. satgi hujan lagu mana ? I intend to have my food there.

Or... not.

Actually we are not sure what is the purpose of the patio, really.

Initial plan memang sebagai dining like my parents' house. So I was thinking of placing the kitchen dining table there instead of buying another one. Aku rasa macam frivolous and melampau lah sangat pulak kalau rumah aku ada sampai 3 dining table.

Okay, fine... Tapi what are we going to do with the empty space in the kitchen now ?

Kamil suggested putting the one from our dining room but then nanti, what are we going to do with that space pulak ?

And I was thinking we must have an option to eat inside the house sebab musim2 nyamuk dok pakat2 keluaq, kami kena makan kat dalam jugak dak ?

So... nak buat living room ? Kena ada telly. Kalau takdak telly memang wasted lah. Ngan aku-aku tak mau duduk tang tu. Hehehhe......... Problem lak. Tapi beranikah nak letak telly kat luaq ? Satgi hilang, haru lah. Bebailah si Kamil.

Anyway, besok2 I will tangkap some gambaq of my almost ready patio, kay ?

Sedih raya dah mula

Semalam Adik told me that Nuzul Al-Quran is the day when Quran goes up to heaven.

“So malam ni Quran saya akan naik ke atas lah….”

Hehehhehe….

“Buat apa naik atas…?”

“Err…. I dunno… “

She cocked her head to the side, in deep thoughts. I didn’t correct her yet because I want to know what is cooking in there.

Then..”Maybe, Allah nak baca kot… Dia nak pinjam……….”

HAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHH !

Sigh… you can really make my day lah Adik even though your story sebenarnya terbalik.

Nuzul Quran, little one is the day the first ayat Quran diperturunkan dari Allah and was brought by Malaikat Jibrail to Rasullullah SAW while he was bertapa-ing in Gua Hiraq, where he was commanded to Iqra’ or bacalah.

So really instead of naik, it actually turun you know….

Hehheheh……………..

Anyway, pejam celik, pejam celik dah nak raya dah. And seperti biasa and seperti tahun2 sebelumnya dari aku kecik sampai lah aku besar, aku sayu when raya is around the corner. Pantang dengar lagu raya aku mesti rasa nak sebak.

When I was smaller, aku sebik bila I thought about my Arwah Tok Wan who passed away when I was 7. Everytime balik Penang terasa sangat dia tak ada. EVenthough for years he was just there on the bed, but I love being with him. We sort of have a staring contest where I would just look at him and he me. Then I would scrutinise his face and hands where I take note of every mole and wrinkles. And I would inhale him. Scent is very important to me. I would always inhale his scent and feel satisfied when the familiarity of it took over my senses.

I also get veryyyy sebak everytime I waved goodbye to my Tok in Perak when we singgah sekejap on the way to Penang. Sampai dia meninggal, kami memang tak pernah rasa beraya dengan dia. Tak pernah... We usually singgah aje on the way to Penang or on the way back to KL.

Eventhough I was small and he was always smiling when we leave, but I could always sense his sadness sebab tak dapat beraya dengan my mom and us kids.

So bila aku besar ni I got sad kenang kan yang aku tak pernah cium tangan dia pagi raya. And now he is gone. Walaupun it is not my fault, but.... well I still feel guilty.

Nangis dah ni.....

I think I am malancholy by nature. Sebab itu dari kecik I am always studying and inhaling my elders sebab aku macam nak take stock of their presence or their being so that when they are gone, I have something to remember by and to hold on. And then get sad about...

Emotional suicide, a friend told me.

Now of course, tambah sedih ingat kan Shera. Writing her name suddenly felt so alien. Macam she is just a frigment of my imagination. Semalam E was at my home when I returned from work. She didn't come to greet me though because she was bathing. So after hugging my kids, seperti biasa I threw myself on the sofa in front of the telly and tiba-tiba there she was, running happily when she saw me. She sat next to me, body leaning heavily against mine, talking a mile a minute.

While she talked, I carressed her hair and seperti biasa only half listened to the incessant chatter. Dah malam nak tidur baru aku rasa eh, macam kurang aje anak aku. And baru teringat, oh tadi ada extra tapi aku dah pulangkan kat bapak dia. And after like 5 hours baru aku nak rasa sedih that dia dah takde mak. That I am her surrogate mak and... well.... how life can be sooo unfair.

Isshh... tak baik.

Sigh........

Kisah aku kat sinun........

Sooo……….

Dah jumpa blog balik malas pulak nak tulis.

Semalam I was down south again. Dah lama tak pegi. Dulu masa selalu pegi complain memanjang. Dah jarang pegi rindu pulak. Kang dah tak boleh pegi langsung (sebab dah kena jual….), sure meraung.

Anyway… for sahur my colleague ajak pegi makan at a mamak restaurant in front of the hotel. Aku memang kembang tekak nak pegi that particular restaurant sebab demenya jarang sapu lantai. Kalau at the place where your clients can see pun you are not that particular about its cleanliness, I just do not want to imagine what the hidden places (ie the kitchen) look like.

On the way there I saw another restaurant that was opened too. Sedap aku dengar ketung-ketang kuali especially since the kuali was placed right in front of the clients. Ndak jugak aku jenguk jap but my colleague tak nak. Buat dek aje bila aku suggest, so aku pun mengekor dia aje le.

Dah sampai situ, tekak aku makin kembang. Tak lalu aku nak makan Maggie gorengnya. Singgah 7-11 and I bought 2 Zips, a packet of creamed buns and the all important Vitagen.

Rasa loya sampai ke petang, okay ?

Anyway, funny thing happened to me on the way to the airport. My other colleague V suggested that I use this taxi service that he used before to get me to the airport. The pakcik very good he said. Ok le… The driver hensem macam Gerard Butler he said again. Suka hati.

Ada ke halfway to the airport, pakcik hensem seumpama Gerard Butler…punya tukang kebun ni tanya aku, “Cik mengantuk tak ?”

“Ngantuk jugak Pakcik…. Dah bangun sahur kan….”

“Itu lah saya ni pun mengantuk ni ha…..” Err…. patut le bawak teksi terhoyong-hayang sikit.

“Biasanya saya waktu ni tidur kejap kat rumah… 10 minit pun jadilah……….”
Errr………. Okay…

“Cik kisah tak kalau saya berhenti kejap tepi jalan tidur sekejap ?”

What ?

Excuse me, what ?

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Aku dah tua agaknya... cepat terharu....

I had a lovely and touching buka puasa at my mom’s yesterday.

Mom made pancakes and spaghetti Bolognese for some reason, to the delight of my husband and my son. My daughter who’s taste matches mine were relieved at the sight of cempedak goreng and keropok leko supplied by MH. Then CT and MD came with cara berlauk and a few other kuihs so Adik and I were quite happy.

Anyway, what was so lovely about buka yesterday ? Because kita orang ramai-ramai berkumpul.

My littlest nephew was there, gurgling his milk and looking sooooo cute. He is uber adorable.

My sisters, CT and CY and their hubbies, MD and MH were there. My still single brothers (it is amazing that all my parents’ daughters are married while their sons are still single !) were also there, filling the very small space with their huge bods. Actually we usually sup in the patio but because berbuka is Maghrib time, which is when all the nyamuks (aedes and non-aedes) keluar bersuka-ria so we had to cramp inside. The table only sits 6 so some of us had to sit on the sofa there that only sits 2 (okay…4 if we huddle close) and some on the piano bench.

It was really funny because you could never see the same people on the dining chairs as we run up for prayers in batches and those who got up to replenish their drinks would find their seats now occupied. We had stopped bothering to re-claim our seats as we know the I-don’t-see-your-name-written-here fight would definitely ensued.

I got a bit teary eyed that my husband and brothers-in-law were comfortable enough to enter Mum’s room for their prayers. And when buka time all of us dok sibuk melayan budak-budak makan, my husband actually took a cup to my mom who was busy flipping pancakes.

And when I saw my husband took a bite of bubur caca and passed his bowl to my mom, saying “Ini rasa sirap, Mummy… cuba rasa…” and my mom with furrowed brows took a bite too and suddenly both of them broke into a laugh, I could feel tears threatening to drop. Soon the bowl passed around the table as curious tongues wanted to have a taste too. That somehow buat aku sebek too.

The sight of my husband burping the littlest member of the family then proudly held him aloft for all to see was also quite a touching moment for me. Plus when MD hugged Ana and Esya with utmost affection when they came running towards him, asking about the toys he bought them yesterday.

Or when CY confidently told her husband who came in his Harley that Kamil would send her and the baby home without even checking with Kamil first. She knew Kamil wouldn't mind the 5 minute trip.

Then all of us trooped to Masjid Negeri for Isyak and Terawikh and waited patiently for all the members afterwards eventhough we came in different cars.

Due to that my doa after Isyak was a single “Thank you, Allah for the gift that you have bestowed upon us………”

PS : Oh yeah, sampai rumah Mummy aje MI threw the upstairs window open and yelled, “Korang pegi mana ?”

Hehhehe…. Tertinggal rupanya sorang kat atas.

My mom replied, “Aku nengok ko berposing atas katil… malas nak kacau………..”
Hehhehehe……………………..

Selamat Menyambut Ramadhan...

Selamat berpuasa, kawan-kawan.

Pejam celik pejam celik dah puasa again.

And I soooo vividly remember last puasa.

Jatuh tangga and sampai nan la tak baik – baik lagi. Dok berdengkot jugak lagi. Sakitnya dah pi ke lutut pulak. Kamil suspected it is gout (YIKES !!!!!) but I am sure it has got something to do with my ankle which refused to heal properly.

Saturday we went to see Captain America. Boy was he handsome. Because seats were limited, we had to buy the 7.50 show. Mai 7.30 aje all of us (there were 8 of us, the usual 4 plus my 2 brothers, my sister CT and her husband) trooped to the surau and lo and behold ! terkejut kita orang becausevthere were sooo many people there.

Aku terharu tengok these young people usaha nak solat sebelum bersuka-ria. The men’s surau siap berimam lagi and it was sooo filled to the brim, they had to do 2 sessions. Oh.. terharu lagi.

Captain America was amazing !!! He is soooo yummy…. Okay, he and Thor can fight for the yummiest superhero in my world. Iron Man… heheh… tak yah lah. Stay down below, my friend.

Itu cerita malam… Siang-siang as usual the kids’ classes, then jumpa contractor (I am finally adding a PATIO at my house ! Yeay !!!!) then…masak, then hantar budak2 lagi (tapi tak yah ambik sebab Amelia hantar kan… Thanks, hon) then kelam kabut siap for wayang. Bibik on Friday lagi we sent her to Kak M’s house.

Sunday was busy. We tried going to pasar but it was too full. Went for breakfast, then pergi belek my nephew at his own abode, then picked my maid up from Kak M’s house to send her to CY’s, then to my mom’s to say hello but stayed for like 1 hour for cok udang and gossips. Then rushed home to siap then picked up CA at CY’s house for a spot of baju raya kat KLCC. But it turned out CY nak ikut (don’t tell my mom okay because dia belum habis pantang)and she said MI nak ikut tapi.... MI was at mom’s so definitely cannot go and pick him up sebab nanti Mak kami nampak… It was all kelam-kabut. Tulis pun penat.

There were no places to eat at KLCC anymore. Kamil took the children for lunch while I helped CA cari baju for her daughter (which Kamil paid for…. Aww…. Thank you, Babah !) and CY and MH (her hubby) cari baju for their son.

When it was our turn to eat, food court was soooo penuh (it was like 4.30 !) so we decided to go to A&W only to find it was not there!Anymore ! What the…. ! We soon discovered that neither was Burger King, nor DeliFrance not even KFC are still around ! Giler apa ? Yang tinggal Aunty Anne’s so itu jelah aku geget sebab perut dah lapar.

Balik hantar CA and my niece balik dulu then at home we kemas sedikit sebanyak then to my mom’s for dinner of nasi ayam then terawikh !

Penat weii…..

Aku penat….

Anyway… tak sedap hati sikit dengan Bibik baru. I have a feeling that she is going to run away soon.

Heheh…

Well…… dia nak balik raya. While that is understandable, how can she go when she just got here ? Plus Bibik Idah (mom’s bibik) nak balik so 2 households without maids are quite unimaginable. Plus we have to consider the household of my sister who is still in confinement.

I told her she can go back next year. It has always been in practice that our maids have to take turn. Yang penting my mom must have a maid. I also told her she can go back for Raya Haji.

“Suami saya mulanya tak benarkan saya kemari kak. Syaratnya saya harus pulang raya………… baru saya dibenarkan datang..”

Pulak dah……….

Hmmmmmmmm.............

So.... well....

Hmmm..............

When my blog went missing, I despaired and despaired because I have so many things to say.

I seriously contemplated to create another blog but resisted. I was in agony because there was sooo many things to say and I missed writing.

But now..... Hmmm.........

What to say ?

Errr...........

Never mind lah....

Dah lupa semua.

Dapat balik blog aku ? Yippee !

Hey people....

I am back !!!!!

I lost my blog for awhile and suddenly I got it again.

Happiness ! Sebab there is still an avenue to complain about my husband again... Eh.. Bukanlah... To talk about my life again...

As if...

Until next time. Ciao !

Just wanna say hi...

So it is midnight and as my son always love to say it, it's today's tomorrow !

Indeed ...

I have orders of chicken lasagna and like 200 cream puffs. Okay, the problem with

1) chicken lasagna is I have never done one. I have protested but the person who ordered was confident that I could overcome whatever problem I have in my head. The only time I use minced chicken is for halal scotch eggs (hehhe... have to stress the halalness) and chicken balls. I am not liking the way my chicken ragu is looking right now.

2) cream puffs... tak jadi !! Setelah bertahun-tahun buat, today of all the days it didn't turn out like how it should. And aku super berpeluh sebab the client wants it for her hantaran.

Help !

I was on leave since Tuesday. Kamil... well... dia buat perangai lagi and quit his job. So since he is on in-between-jobs holiday and knowing his perangai yang susah sangat nak ambik cuti, we took the opportunity to have a short holiday in Terengganu. Kamil told the kids he wants to see where I was born. Ada aje....

So we went early Tuesday morning and came back Thursday afternoon. Friday morning we were busy in and out of abang and adik's school then busy beli barang for the orders that I took and then pegi jumpa abang's paed for his appointment.

And then now, aku sakit kaki macam hapa aje, worrying about the cream puffs that are not puffing as they should.

Will tell more about our Terengganu trip next entry.

Anyway, we had a kenduri doa selamat last weekend. Family and extremely close friends only as I couldn't find my cutleries so in order tak nak meminjam dari sapa-sapa and risk losing theirs (cutleries like to hide themselves), so aku invited agak-agak cukup sudu aku aje.

Hehehhe....

It was a success as far as kenduris go. MI didn't come though. The only way I could think of to lure him back was promising joget lambak after orang balik but still he didn't come so no joget lambak. Darn.... heheh.

Okay, my second batch of cream puffs still failed to puff....

Early morning ketung ketang in the kitchen nampaknya.

Sigh.....

My weekend

So this weekend felt like Hari Raya....

Because we went to sooo many birthday parties rasa macam dok pi open houses aje... Hhehehe...

Started with birthday party of the daughter of one of my oldest and dearest friend. And they celebrated mine too which was soooo nice and made me sooo terharu.... Ada gambaq. Sat na... Nak pi pinch from her FB jap.



Anyway, that's us. Form giggly girls to giggly mums. Thank you, darlings. It was such a fun meeting even for a short while.

Then we went home, to bathe and pray lepas tu shoot off to Kamil's aunt's house for her granddaughter's birthday. Makan lagi. They barbecued and it was really nice. Kenyang pun makan jugak because Angah is known for her culinary prowess. Her nasi goreng was delicious.

Took family pictures, the whole lot of us but I kenot paste it here.... Takut ada orang tak suka their pictures posted without their permission.

Balik terus tidur macam ulau.

Pepagi Kamil played football with Anu and Shazmi so I had to sent the kids to their class. Since Kamil offered to go to the market for me, aku berlingkar with the latest Dorothy Koomson. I was jolted out of my semi-enjoyment of the book(because it wasn't that nice... boleh ajelah)because Kamil ... well... hehehhe.... pi langgaq the gate.

I was just so happy it wasn't me so I said nothing while I watched his bewildered face and frantic look around trying to pin somebody the blame. Hheheheh....

Luckily he knew his obligations so even though he hasn't the mood, he dragged himself to Shera's parents'house. Birthday of their granddaughter too.

That was my first time actually entering their house after her death so it was rather emotional for me. I sat on the same couch where I saw Ana for the first time, so round, so fair lying on it. I kissed and kissed and kissed her and congratulated my sister-in-law for her cleverness producing such a fine specimen. I remember she went, "Ye ke ?" and laughed her unique laugh.

They had tables outside for their guests so I sat and ate where my mom bathed the body of her beloved daughter-in-law. Where I pour cold water on her body, something that I don't know why we must do. And the little nieces and nephews she has never seen !

And to see her siblings, they share the same eyes, some share her mannerisms was hard for me. Even after 3 years I still mourn her. It is really not easy. She was a big part of our lives and ... ah well... There is nothing I can do about it now, can I ?

We stayed for 3 hours talking to her family who still welcome us, still thinks that we are family.

Well...

Anyway, after that we came home and Kamil and I golek-golek in bed, just talking when I heard Abang coughing. He was just sitting outside our room, doing God knows what while he coughed again and again. So I called him and when he answered I could hear his tears. He was actually crying softly outside.

Sedih hati mak ni dengar so I called him to me and he came and laid next to me, sobbing softly. Kecik hati dengan Adik rupanya, and waiting anxiously for his friend that was suppose to come.

Aku pujuk dia sedikit sebanyak then we went down together.

We watched the telly together before I realised that I haven't seen Adik around. Called her and there she was sobbing sensorang jugak rupanya on the couch.

Laa... awatnya ni ?

Kecik hati dengan Abang because she heard him blaming her for his sorrows when she is the one upset because Abang wouldn't let her blow her noisy balloon (you guys know right those party balloons that made a trumpet-like noise when you deflate them ?)and now the balloon has burst.

Pulak...

Sedih hati mak ni tengok anak-anak yang bawak hati jauh-jauh sorang-sorang.

Well it is my fault, really.

Because I have a lot of siblings, I couldn't hear my children fighting. I will after a while but usually I can just block it off my head. I think because I am used to the noise of people bickering so I am immune to it. Kamil is forever telling me off for letting the kids fight.

But... because I have a lot of siblings, I cannot take the sound of people crying. I suppose because I hear it a lot when I was growing up and I am sooo tired of it. It irritates the hell out of me. My children know that Mummy hates crying so they have been trained to either swallow their cries or take it elsewhere.

So really, I am forever stumbling upon my children heaving and sobbing in a corner somewhere and I find I am a better mother for it because when I see them like that, I would take the time to listen and pujuk.

But.... itu kalau aku jumpa. What about those heart-wrenching episodes that I didn't see and my babies just cry their eyes out alone ?

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAA !!!!!!!!!!!!

Do I need to change my rule now ?

Dah lama tak tulih pasai my boring weekend

Last weekend was quite full for us.

Friday abang and adik had a sleep-over at their cousin’s so their parents thought that they will have a nice time tengok wayang ke hapa ke but it turned out these stupid mak bapak ended up fighting and didn’t even have dinner together.

Bapaknya sulking tunggu mak ajak dinner. Mak super duper bengang went out to tapau food then makan sengsorang dalam bilik while watching old NCIS dvds. Pueh hati. Plus, I didn’t know he was waiting for me to ajak makan kan ? Plus, why must he wait for me ? Can’t he make the effort to say sorry and ajak dinner ? Let us not go there…. Jadi lain kang entry nih….

Anyway, mak pagi2 pegi bawak maid buat FOMEMA. While waiting, bapak ada hati call mak. Lepas tu call bukannya untuk say sorry ke hapa, but call to ajak makan dengan mak bapak dia !

Errmm…. HELLO ?

You must be kidding me. Gilo apo ?

Mak hung up the phone. Pueh hati.

Sampai rumah, bapak pun keluar. I thought he went out with his parents (pukul 10 pagi lunch… awal giler, she thought) so mak dok diam-diam nengok tv. Then, tiba-tiba balik rumah orang tu.

Aiik ? Tak jadi ke ? Then terus landing sebelah mak nengok tv sekali. Err…. I thought we are still fighting ? How dare you duduk sebelah I ? WAAAAAAAAA !!! Sakitnya hati.

Dalam 20 minutes of watching the telly in silence and stewing at his audacity of sitting next to me (I tell you people, I was bloody pissed off of this fight … I really don’t know why), suddenly dengaq ada orang honk kat luar.

Bapak quickly got up. Must be his parents picking him up. “Please come with me….” He said suddenly, eyes so very redup with hope.

Hhehehe…. Tergelak kejap. Tapi dalam hati only as no way can I show him just with that 4 words aku terus tak marah dak… Ego orang tua….

“You have 20 minutes sitting next to me and you didn’t say anything ? Last2 minute baru nak cakap ?” I asked in a not too friendly tone and bristled for good measure. “I thought I dah bagi message loud and clear that I nak you pegi….” Jawab bapak pulak.

“Message apa you bagi ?”

“Tadi… I dah laga-laga kaki dengan you….” Hhehehe…. Sian dia.

Okaylah… The wicked witch of the west I am not so I grabbed my tudung and followed him out.

“Where are we going ?” and even though my question is expected, his answer made me bristle again.

Awana Genting Highlands.

Doesn’t he know that for travels that cross the state line I need preparations ? Loo visit first then extra knickers then wipes, loads of it, extra clothings for the little ones and so on and so forth.

I need to prepare !

Aku cuma sempat loo visit aje and because his parents will be in the car, his arse was saved.

I didn’t eat much up there because the headache generated from his very fast driving up the hill. Whatever I partook was good though, the chicken soup, and the red jelly, chocolate pudding and its caramel version. The cake was dry, so urgh… Oh yeah the yong tow foo was good too.

We were up there for 2 hours max before we came down again. Sent the kids home then mak bapak yang dah reconcile ni (heheh) went to The Curve to get tickets for X-Men. No dinner for us adults, but the kids who can’t read their tummy properly had O’Brien’s sandwiches, while mak bapak watched and salivated over every bite they took. Hehheheheh…..

X-Men was nice. I love it ! It was so good, Adik didn’t sleep in the darkened wayang even though we caught the 10pm show. James McAvoy is yum-mee ! Sigh…..

Sunday morning mak and bapak braved the rain for pasar tani. We buy our biccies from there and we were running low. Aku tak tahulah, maybe because we came from the generation that buys our biscuits by the kilos, bapak and I had always felt that biscuits dalam packets are not as nice as the ones that came from dirty and rusted tins. And being ol’ timers, we only like biskut jagung and good ol’ chocolate wafers. Yumm……………..

After beli biskut sampai RM30 (dah beli dalam kilo… mahal le….), cari breakfast (makanan kat pasar tani tak sedap sangat… so memang kena cari carefully) then balik. Bapak went to survey for new rims and I… ? Well kelam kabut mangkit dari tiduq when I heard his car came in…. HEheheh… boleh tertiduq pukui 10 pagi….





Anyway, siap-siap by 12 we headed for KLCC and we reached there by 12.30. Yup… you read it right. Half an hour to get to KLCC. We couldn’t believe it either. Went to send my watch for repair (sebulan okay to just assess what is wrong and give me a quotation… Orang kat Malaysia tak tau repair jam… depa kena hantaq pi Singapore… Buat malu aje) then pusing-pusing sat before heading or the food court for lunch. Punyalah ramai so we abandoned the plan and brave ourselves to try the new restaurant Ben’s Place which replaced our all–time favourite, California Pizza Kitchen.

Sedey tau… I love the ravioli at California’s Pizza Kitchen. Why good things never last ? Why ?

Food was okay. My steak sandwich was all right but the chicken pie bapak had with his daughter was tough and uninspiring. Abang seemed to be okay with his burger, though.

We were actually on a mission so we stopped by Mid Valley but our mission failed so we consoled ourselves at MPH and later Delifrance. I was planning for an Italian dinner and looking at the array of crusty baguettes, I ordered 1. Nak flavor apa, kak ? asked the guy at the counter. Ada flavor ? Rupanya we can either choose kaya or garlic. I chose garlic and menyesal tak sudah because that guy was spread happy that very minute because he slathered, and slathered and slathered some more of the fattening garlic butter on my bread. So much so I had to ask him to stop and go easy. In fact I asked him to scrape of some and transfer it to the other bread. Dasat.

Anyway, balik.. guling-guling sat then I made dinner. And had the butt enhancing garlic bread.

Hmmm...............

So hari tu I watched the Switch, janda si Brad Pitt with the Teen Wolf guy ? She looked so old, aku rasa macam kesian sangat. Eventhough she is beautiful, she no match for Angelina Jolie, the sexy siren.

So I pitied her while I watched her acting it out, not just because of her sad love story but also because the movie sucks. Well not sucked really but I was none to impressed. Biasa aje. The movie didn't make me feel all nice nad lovey-dovey or euphoric but actually like most movies of late, it is sort of unfinished and looked hurried. I don't think she is very successful on the big screens. Kesian pulak.

Because the other woman is phenomenal in the movies. Always hated if the other woman wins.

Am watching Jake Gyleenhaal and Anne Hathaway's movie now. I see a lot of her bare skin and it is beautiful. Simply gorgeous. Her body is narrow and lithe with creamy skin. Made me feel very nervous... about how I look... he heh.

Anyway, it was Shera's birthday 3 days ago.

I miss her.

I really do.

Especially when I hear Anuar Zain's new song. She would have loved that song.

It is a nice song.

Why

Those who know the connection between me and one of Malaysia's biggest GLC's announcement yesterday would know why I am feeling quesy.

Quesiness that stemmed from uncertainties for my future.. well my professional future that is.

I love what I am doing now. And surprise, surprise I am actually quite good at it. Something that I found out 3 months ago from my bosses. They were very,very complimentary and those compliments were made even sweeter with my promotion.

I was at the prime of my life. I have good bosses, team members that I truly care about and work that hey... I am good at and enjoy.

Up until Friday (yesterday aje...)before lunch, I was euphoric about next week, and was busy making plans and juggling schedule for the rest of the team.

Then balik office after lunch and my world turned upside down.

Devastating news. Something that I expected to happen really but we were promised that it would wait. Not until next 2 years and when we learn the outcome of the upcoming project.

But the powers that be decided to do it early, when the project had only started 3 months ago.

It shouldn't affect me. But it does. And I am unsure about the future because they hired me for my expertise in this field. And when they decided not to be involve in this field anymore, what am I going to do ?

My bosses aren't worried about me. They say I will fit in seamlessly. One boss said "You took this job like duck to water, I have no worry for you trying other industry... Don't limit yourself to one only.........."

But this industry is my passion. I love it. I did try for 3 years in a different industry but it was bo-ring. I couldn't take it. It was so bland and blah and unchallenging.

I don't want to leave this conglomerate that I have loved. I really don't.

But.......

Why can't they let things be for at least 2 years ?

I love my team. I am going to miss them.

I love my clients. I am going to miss them too. Some are not clients anymore. They are somebody that I have learnt to respect and have high regards for.....

Darn it...... Good things never last.

Why ?

Hari ini

So hari tu my adik-beradik and I went to watch Insidious. Mak Boyot tu yang ndak so kami ni mengekor aje. Sebelum masuk wayang kita orang pakat-pakat kutuk dia, cerita apa yang kome pilih ni ? Nampak macam tak best. Pelakon pun tak kenai. Awat kita tak tengok Priest/Johnny Depp si Lanun ke hapa ke ?

Dah masuk, semua orang kejung kaki sebab takut. Tak kenal pun whomever on the screen pun tak kisah lah sebab seram !!!!

Kamil and MI gelak2 for some reason. Aku rasa demenya gelak sebab takut. Si Mak Boyot as reported by her husband keep having contractions. Nasib baik she is a doctor so she can handle it by herself lah... HAHAHHAAH...Ada ke.

Today aku coti. Woot ! Woot ! Tapi coti amende. Pagi pergi office dulu. Kamil waited in the car for a good 1 and a half hours before we rushed to SJMC for his appointment. Then office balik. I dunno why my boss always ask me whenever I cuti, "You nanti ada datang office tak ?" Hai lah... dah namanya cuti, buat apa den nak pi office ? Tapi bila dah kata-kata itu dikeluarkan, terpaksa jugak lah.

What to do. Sigh.........

Then balik rumah sebab Kamil cannot tahan tengok aku bawak laptop company keliling, before we went out again for lunch at Sari Ratu.

Dah lama aku tak pegi Sari Ratu, terlupa how violent to the tongue the kuah asam could be. It was hell. The ais teler was comforting though.

Pastu balik bam-bam kejap sebelum mangkit balik for my appointment kat DEMC pulak. Hehhehehehe....... Tension kan ? Dah tua, macam inilah. You'd be needing the doctor quite often.

Last week we went to see Bab. So sad. I just cannot describe it but it was sad. He is already out of the ICU so yeay ! But.....

Anyway... nothing much to tell. Still need to fill in my KPI thingy. It is due tomorrow. Apalah aku nak tulis ni ?

Darn it....

Merepek galore

Okay... macam-macam yang aku nak tulis after like a month hiatus. Plenty of things to rant and rave about, to praise about .. but I just didn't have the time and now when I can afford some time, the heat is off so ... heheheh.... macam dah malas nak tulis.

Anyway, I went to Bangkok again. Came back and moved office so now 3 divisions of people like me in one big room. I dont like it really because our team is only about 8 and it was cosy in our previous set-up. Now about 50 of us gathered together, masih nak kena bersuai-kenal and the room is too big...

Anyway, we got a new team member last 2 weeks and with her experience and age, she was made a team lead like me and 2 others. I was glad of her presence as she could take some load off of me.

But, on the first day a colleague and I kena belasah dengan dia. Terkedu kejap kami berdua sebab this being her first day should have tried to make friends instead of exerting power.

Then our boss and myself briefed her of our schedule and plans and what we are currently doing and I think that was a big mistake because I think she now thinks that I am a threat as she only asked for my, and only mine, credentials. WTF.

Then we talked about some projects and she dengan selambanya said okay, I can take this over from you now. Errr......

So dah macam dah tak best dah. Before her arrival a new guy came in and he also sort of disrupted our synergy as before we were sheltered from office politics. Safe to say none of us were interested. We were busy working and being a team. We gave each other credits, we openly tell our bosses if a discovery were made by another team memeber and not us... We were that confident in our skin and we do love and respect each other that much.... but now... Sigh.............

I hate it when things change... or the winds of change is being felt already.....

Everything is okay at the home front. Well except for Bab being sick and Bibik is going home soon.

Talking about that, semalam she came up to me eyes red, begging for me to send money to Indonesia because electricity at her house was about to be cut. Okay, okay I said... chill.... I will do it. Please, she said again as kalau nak disambung balik bayarannya 3 juta... Sian omak bibik sakit-sakit duduk dalam gelap.

Iyolah bibik, said I. I will do it.

Nak dijadikan cerita, Western Union off line. Sedih aku sebab bergelap malam ni omaknya bibik. Dan malam esoknya (today le tu) because cuti Wesak and Western Union totup pulak.

Nak ku leter kan, itulah bibik masa bibik bekerja pun bil elektrik buleh terlepas. Ni nanti bibik tak kerja lagi la.... Tapi because I am not a nag, I keep all in. Nampaknya kena jugak aku hulur kat bibik bulan-bulan lepas ni. Tak sanggup den memikir....

Sigh.....

My Bab

So I went to see Bab.

He was diagnosed with colon cancer and had his operation to remove the affected areas last week.

I didn’t get to see him because the visiting hours didn’t gel with my working ones. How very frustrating.

Then he went for another operation because he had some kind of infection.

When I went to see him, he was heavily sedated. I just looked at him as my cousin told me not to wake him up. I bawled my eyes out because he looked so fragile, so vulnerable so broken. My mind kept taking me when he was younger, the jet setter who was not based at home. The guy whom we had to sit down and chat with every time he is in the country for the holidays. Like going in for a job interview, he would ask the name of our schools, our grades, hobbies etc. I sometimes think that was just his ice-breaking session with us because we were always shuffling our feet, being very uncomfortable at first, talking to this guy whom we see once a year but after every session, we would be the best of friends already. Suddenly he would be our favourite uncle. Again.

His wife, my Mami Ela is the warmest person ever so we never had to break any ice with her. Hugs and kisses were aplenty and we always fell in love with her at first sight.

While I sobbed and sobbed and sobbed, he suddenly opened his eyes. Kamil remarked, “Tidur macam Abang… bukak mata….” Padahal that guy was already awake.

Anyway, his hand started shaking and he kept looking at me.
I quickly called my cousin again as I was at lost at what to do. He did specifically tell me not to wake him up so now that he is awake, I need to know what are the rules and regulations.

My cousin asked if he was calm and he was. Then I asked if I can talk to him but my cousin didn’t think it was a very good idea since he did ask for me before his second operation and if I talked to him he might want to speak and get excited.
Hearing that I bawled again because … well because he asked for me. I should have been there with him, before he went under again but I didn’t know. I really didn’t.
But… seriously, I wouldn’t know if I could be with him if I had known anyway as I don’t think my bosses would like that very much. Sedih kan…

What am I to do ?

Please pray for my, Bab. Please….I thank you in advance.

Mummy's hair

As a woman whose name is not Anne Hathaway or Audrey Hepburn or even Erra Fazira, I have plenty, plenty of physical flaws. Putting the rest aside, today's tajuk perbincangan is the kerak on my kepala which has been plaguing me ever since as I was a baby.

When I was smaller, whenever my Wan from Perak came over, the first thing she would do was put a pan of coconut milk on the stove and heat it up very slowly until it produces oil, then she would grab me and dekat pintu dapur tu lah grandma would scrape the kerak from her grand daughter's hair with the said oil. And it is "OWWWwwww !!!" okay ? I hated it.

Sadly, Wan's remedy didn't work because the kerak causes me to be inundated with dandruff or kelemumur or ketumbir kata orang dari Seberang pulak. Or maybe I should have menyerah diri aje kat Wan... Agaknya if I weren't so elusive from her grabs, I wouldn't have this problem still. Sigh... the choices one made when one was young.

Anyway, nak dijadikan cerita, since I chanced upon a long gray hair on my head, I have been commissioning my children to do the clearing work. While they were there, they discovered my clusters of keraks and therefore I gave them a Change Order to include scrapping of the keraks in their routine too.

Best kan ?

So almost every night the 2 of them would diligently work on my scalp, armed with a fine tooth comb and baby oil. Sometimes, berdarah-darah jugak kepala aku sampai Kamil kena cekak pinggang and suruh dia orang berhenti. For some reason I do not have the heart to tell them off whenever they yank too hard or the comb dug a tad too deep which drew blood and surprised yelps from me sebab they are very serious about this work. I dunno why.

Anyway, the most fun parts are their reactions which can be sooo funny. Usually that comes from Adik lah, my designated clown.

"You didn't use Head & Shoulder today ke Mummy ?" She asked a few times whenever the white particles are aplenty.

Or,

"Mummy .... you are snowing, Mummy......" whenever she discovered the big mines.

Or just now she exclaimed, "You have brown hair ! I can see brown hair !" And immediately jumped of the chair and ran off to get Kamil, while murmuring, "I have to ask Babah...." face all serious.

I then heard, "Babah, do you like brown hair ?... Because I saw a lot of brown hair on Mummy's hair....." Then she ran back to me, face more relaxed with her thumbs up. "You are lucky Mummy... Babah likes brown hair. I asked him already...."

Heheheheh.............

And then Abang of course tak puas hati, so he said while still behind his book, "You are such a ninny, Adik. Mummy had always have brown hair ! Since she was younger ! Tak tengok ke rambut CT, CY and CA. They all have brown hair ! So Mummy the same aaahh because they all adik beradik !"

Adik only answered with an, "Oh ?"

She is being super cute by wanting to check if Babah is okay with a wife with brown hair. He heh.

What lah you, Adik...

Bibik nak balik

So, referring to the above title... Bibik ku nak balik.

Actually, she had been asking to go home for quite sometime because her momma is ill. But she couldn't because there were extenuating circumstances that stopped me from sending her home. And the extenuating circumstances are not me yeah, it is her previous employer. Enough said.

Anyway... the way she said it, well ... sounded a bit final. She kept saying that she has to take care of her mom and the tone too sort of hinted that she doesn't intend to come back.

So one day while we were cleaning cabinets, I asked her what are her plans when she returns. She is basically the main bread winner, all her salary has been sent home, her children although some have grown, are in no position to support her or their grandma or their school going siblings.

She sighed and looked worried. She admitted she doesn't know what she will do. I then suggested for her to go home for a month or 2 or 3 even, get her life sorted out then come back. How is she going to eat or even buy medication for her mom if she is out of work ?

She was shocked. She asked if I am willing to wait for her that long and inquired what the arrangements for the children would be like. I told her not to worry about us but herself. I informed her that if she is serious about returning, I will take her in.

She looked relieved and instantly became her cheerful self again. She had been under dark clouds for a few months after she found out about her mom's illness so I was ecstatic to see her so happy.

Then, last month her mood was sombre again. Apalah yang jadi pulak ni. Phonecalls from Indonesia came frequently and once I heard her shouting. My kids confided in me that her youngest son has been bailing out of school and has taken upon himself to quit. Senang aje budak tu. Kalau aku dapat aku cubit.

Then, her eldest son chased the daughter that has been living in her house and taking care of the grandma, out. So now the sick mom is not being taken care of.

Pulak.

Last week she opened her heart out to me and we talked for hours. I really pity her and sangat menyampah dengan anak-anak yang tak reti nak menyenangkan mak sendiri.

Bibik is no super Bibik. Her housekeeping is so-so. Many weekends I would be scrubbing the toilet and the kitchen and a hoard of other stuffs. You know the nitty-gritty of house-cleaning, the corners that needed attention, the cobwebs, the shelves that needed wiping and dusting and the likes.

*Terkedu jap nengok video clip Terpesone Scott Hew (I think his name was ) and Syafinaz.... Aku tak tau nak kata apa...

She successfully bore holes in many, many of Kamil's work shirts. All at the cuffs. She also managed to put a tear on a lot of Kamil's t-shirts. All on the left side. Heran jugak, all Kamil's stuffs and all isolated to a certain areas... Hmmm... Sungguh musykil.

But...

She loves the kids. I saw them in a cuddle numerous times and the first thing they did when they come home from school is calling her and beaming happily at her. She would throw herself in front of them bila aku naik hantu. Everything is, "Salah Bibik ni.... Bukannya salah Abang/Adik." That never works thus she would end up standing worriedly next to me.

She voluntarily makes sure my children perform their 5 times a day.

She is a great cook. I love her masak lemak and ayam hitam. Macam makan kat Sari Ratu.

She is also my adviser. Yang akan bagi nasihat kat aku when she sees I am making a mistake. I value her advise and care. It is like having a second mother.

That is why when I asked her last Monday, "Bibik janji balik sini ya ?", her silence worries me.

"Bagi Bibik tanya budak-budak di kampung dulu ya...." Was her answer after dia termenung.

Oh dear.

18 tahun.....

So... yesterday *ehem* *ehem* was our 18th Anniversary.

When I tell people that they go, "You have been married that long ?"

He he... no, no. 18 years of being in love... konon... hehehehhe.

Anyway, Kamil wanted to re-visit our courting days. The first thing that came up in our head was of course Subang Parade because that was where spent most of our stolen times together. Stolen sebab mak den tak bagi dating.... hahahahaha....

Subang Parade was the nearest to our homes so... dah stolen times tu tak leh lah pegi jauh-jauh kan. Anyway, we found that it was hard to retraced our younger steps because eventhough Subang Parade is still there, the old Subang Parade we know has sadly gone as all our favourite hangouts are not there anymore.

1. The foodcourt gone - where we used to eat laksa and beefballs soup and huddled close together while eating this smashing ice-kacang underneath the air-cond no less.

2. Strawberry Field - where we once laughed at this young couple (well... younger than us.. we were so smug of being older that time)because the guy was wearing a blazer and tie and the girl in off-shoulder long green dress... a bit too much since we were in shorts and sandals. The nasi goreng belachan there was yummy ! Strawberry Fields are still around, one in Taipan and one in PJ, but the ambiance is not the same anymore.

3. Rasa Utara - dah tutup langsung. Couldn't find it anywhere.

4. McDonald's still there. Dulu when SP still has a wayang, we would sit at McDonald's for hours talking over his Big Mac and my beef burger. I don't like McD so... it's a definite no-no for our trip through Memory Lane.

Apart from SP, we also frequented Atria for nasi goreng belachan at a restaurant I have now forgotten its name. Kamil said, Atria will be demolished to make way for new building soon and the restaurant ? Loooonnngggg gone already.

So... what is left ? Nampak gayanya we have been together so long sampai all our favourite hangouts dah tutup, I told Kamil.

His eyes lit up then he said, "We still have Cable Car...."

Hehehhehe....... That is right. Eventhough it is not at Jaya Sek 14 anymore, eventhough ot has changed its name from Cable Car to Tram Car, but the Aunty is still there and the food still tastes the same.

Well... dulu nasi goreng RM5.90 and now RM 9.90... Inflation happened..... Nevermind.

So there we were last night, over our Nasi Goreng Indonesia which when I ordered Kamil cheerfully chimed in "Two !" at the waitress. But when he had his first bite he exclaimed, "Eh, ini bukan Yong Chow Fried Rice ke ?" I looked at him and he said, "I nak Yong Chow !! You salah order..."

Errm.... hello. I ordered the Indonesian version for me.. so nothing really changed... He still likes to blame me for the littlest of things. Ha ha ! Anyway it was too hot for him and I was having a good time watching him sweat and went red in the face over the heat.

Aunty came to us and asked, "Pak toe ka ? Kici2 tak bawak ?"

"Takdelah Aunty, kita pak toe lah...."

"Bagus... you memang kena pak toe sekali sekala..." Aunty gave her approval.

"Yalah Aunty, nanti dia lari sama perempuan lain...." This one was definitely from me.

Aunty laughed. "Aiyaa.... jangan risau. Dia datang sini selalu dengan kawan-kawan ramai-ramai punya..." while she patted Kamil's back.

"Aunty, ini hari our 18th Anniversary Aunty. Kita 18 years ago pak toe kat sini lah..."

She gasped in delight. "Masa dekat Jaya sana ? Very good, very good....." and she spent some time with us, telling us the history of her restaurant and a bit about her life.


What a night.

Happy Anniversary, darling.


PS : I asked Kamil, can you imagine us still dating now, at this age ? Yes, he quickly answered. Because I will still have all my hair. Hmmm.... is he blaming me for the demise of his hair ?

*Sob* *Sob*

Yesterday I arrived home late so when I saw the kids pitched up their tents on Abang's double bed, I joined them there.

I was soooo sleepy so while we talked, my eyelids threated to close many, many times. Suddenly Abang quickly got up and announced, "Eh ! Saya lupa sembahyang Isyak lah..." and jumped off the bed.

Adik yang I know doesn't mind missing her Isyaks had to get up too. They usually pray at Adik's room so while she struggled to get out of her tent, Abang stood at her doorway watching her.

"Eh, Adik ! No ! No !" he said. Adik stopped with one leg suspended on mid-air.

"Jangan langkah Mummy !" He added with a frown on his face.

Adik said "Oooppppsssss...." and retreated. Kurang asam lah budak ni.

While waiting for them, I dozed off but was woken up when I heard them swicthing off the lights. I didn't open my eyes though.

"Adik... Sssshhhh..... Mummy is sleeping...." he warned and they quietly climbed back on the bed. As they quietly settled themselves, I could feel somebody was moving towards me and then a feather light kiss on my cheeks from Abang.

Sebek Mummy sekejap for some reason.

Then Adik of course followed, kissing my ears while murmuring, "Good night, darling. Sweet dreams....."

Bergenang air mata aku sebab sayang jugak budak2 ni kat mak yang ntah apa2 ni. Mak yang dah jarang masak, dah lama tak bake cookies and who couldn't remember the last time she goofed around with them.

I have such sweet children, I really do.

Mummy loves you, kiddoes. Very, very much.

Ice-cream hunt

Adik called me last week at the office.

She sighed dramatically and said, “I think my teacher wants me to lose all my teeth, Mummy…”

Pulak dah…

“Yes… sebab teacher asked us to eat 22 (she raised her voice in disbelief kononnya at this point) ice-cream! I think she wants me to muntah (eleh…) and lose my teeth from eating too much ice-cream !”

“Are you telling me, Adik that your teacher gave you an assignment to eat 22 ice-creams ? Really ? You think I was born yesterday ?”

She sighed again, more dramatics this time as I can hear her think, “Boy, this woman is stupid…” and said, “No…. She wants us to bring 22 ice-cream sticks to school ! So I have to eat 22 ice-creams lah !”

Hehheheh…………

“Adik….there is me, and Babah and Abang and all your Mamus and Ciks and Esya and Ana and they will help you eat all those ice-creams. You don’t have to eat all 22 on your own…. Don’t worry….” Saja je aku.

But her, “Oh…” saddens me for some reason. And made me laugh.

Anyway, so that night off we went to search for ice-creams. Babah was shocked that no ice-cream costs less than RM1. We went from one shop to another until I asked him, “You cari ice-cream 20 sen tu ke ? Mana ada dah Kamil oii….. Inflation happened….”

So at the end we spent like RM40 for all 22 sticks of ice-cream.




Ana had one. Esya had 2. Mummy had 2. Babah probably a bit more. The rest was up to Adik and Abang.

So you could imagine my annoyance when yesterday Babah asked her, “So what happened to all your ice-cream sticks ?”

“Ada kat rumah lah….”

“Tak guna ke kat sekolah ?”

“Takkk…. Teacher suruh guna sweets…”

“Sweets ? What for pulak ?” Tinggi suara Kamil.

“Kamil… they are using it for counting… But…. dah beria suruh bawak hari Jumaat, tak guna pun ? Guna sweets pulak ?”

Masa ni Adik shrunk to her seat and I just shook my head. Biar benar cikgu ni…. Or has my daughter pulled the biggest con of the year ?

Hmmmm……………………

Hikayat Merong Mahawangsa

Soo….. Merong Mahawangsa…..

Hmmmmmmmm……

Ginilah. I am not going to say I wasted my RM8 per head or I that I wasted my time.
It is actually quite a good effort. I was swelling with pride watching about the history of my people.

Buuuuttttt…. Stephen Rahman tu…. Boleh tak next time somebody else tolong cakap untuk dia. Macam dubbing gitu. Instead of body double we use voice double. Because each time he spoke in Malay, Kamil and I burst out laughing.

Sungguh tak real.

The mamat who acted as orang jahat … Kemawas I think his name was, was superb. His acting was soooo good because I hated him at sight.

And the guy who played the Roman prince, Marcus was gorgeous and such a good actor. I wonder which corner of the earth they korek-ed him from. Well done, mate.

Adik si Nor yang gila nar nak kat Aidil tu got the hero this time and she too is commendable.

It is a good effort. Not quite there yet… but good.

Still quite a room for improvement.

And puh-lease don’t tell me I should try and see if I could do better. I am the audience and you have to win me, no matter if I can direct a movie or not.

Just in case adik-beradik KRU baca lah blog ni.

He heh.

Cuma.... hmmm... for next post...

Aku jua tension dengan Anuar Zain

Yesterday... dok boring-boring tang sini I suddenly remembered that this was a good time to catch-up on my blog reading. I haven't been visiting in a long while because of work commitments ... Sometimes I wonder if work is worth it. Not being able to cook for my kiddies as much as before, not being able to sit down and read, not being able to do a lot lah basically...

Melalut tang lain lagi.....

Anyway.. it was this favourite blog of mine that got me into thinking... actually that got me into this mood. This blogger mentioned about her husband that doesn't seem to be aware of her existence and I got so sad because I can so relate to that. Laki yang lebih pentingkan nengok tv dari bini and laki yang lebih suka duduk menyepi dari bercakap dengan aku... And I wonder sometimes, mamat yang dok lena sebelah aku ni... rela ke tidak sebenarnya kawin dengan aku ni ?

And I had always wondered if I ever pushed him towards the kadi and dia sebenarnya tak hingin pun nak together-gether dengan aku.

All the while I was here in Thailand amidst their people who truly, truly LOVE their King.. he only managed one call to me... to rant and rave about our children. Oh yeah another one call to ask why I didn't answer his sms... That was it.

In my head, I was expecting a more lovesick spouse who misses me, as I have been the minute I touched down in Bangkok. One who does not give a damn about the phone bill because all that matters is he has to hear his beloved's voice. And aku being aku has always been very embarrassed about forcing someone to love me... You know... like perigi mencari timba kind of a deal. So if he deosn't want to call... then I won't call because probably he doesn't want to talk to me.

But then again, reading the rest of her entry... she asked if the grass really greener at the other side ? Good point. What if all Malay men are like that ?

Reading her BFF's blog pulak she talked about her aunt who asked, what more do you want ? He comes home every night and a good provider. And if I am not mistaken, the aunt also said, we young people always talk about love loss lah and that kind of malarky.

So mahu tak mahu, I have to agree. It has to be enough. Maybe by coming home is the only way he can show that he knows I existed, then I have to take it.

By God it has to be enough .....

And therefore, I also blame my malancholy ramblings on Anuar Zain. Stop with your Lelaki Ini, please !!!! Konon ! Tipu !!!! Mana ada lelaki camtu...

PS : By now I think you 2 ladies already who u r, so please don't mention about the breadmaker again !!!!

Dekat Pattaya tak ada nasi goreng pattaya

So here I am in Pattaya. Well not exactly Pattaya but Sriracha. Pattaya is near, reachable by taxi at RM150 though.

One week already.

My face has started to look very tom yum-y on account of the many, many bowls of the spicy soup I had guzzled.

The meeting just now was surprisingly successful. I took the lead while my boss looked on was scary. I was more worried about him than the customers.

We went around Pattaya last Sunday. As I mentioned before it was RM150 to get there. Damn. But because I was the lead, I took it upon me to pay for the trip.

Pattaya was crowded. Waaayyyy crowded with sunbathers on the very narrow beach on the many, many sunloungers. Jostling for the already crowded space were the traders, selling from pork (and more pork and more on the porcine kind) and clothes and little bunnies in shirts. That one I like. I was contemplating to bring a few home but… well….. I don’t think the hotel would find that very amusing.

There were a few Halal food traders, thank God but the one we went to sold sausages that looked suspiciously un-halal. Ikan, he said. So with Bismillahirrahmannirrahim, Luqman (my team mate) bought 200 gm.

First bite, I knew it was not ikan. But the damn thing was already in my hand and I was chewing it with burgeoning trepidation. Where to spit around this huge crowd ? And do I have to samak-ed my mouth ?

Walking further on spotted another Halal trader selling the same fish-ball sized sausages. Chicken, he said…. and that made more sense than ikan. But come to think of it, maybe the first guy did say chicken. Why would a Thai guy speak Malay ? Right ? Besides ikan and chicken do rhyme…. Hehehehhe.

There was nothing much to see except the bodies on beach and the bodies trawling the market. Oh… but we did see this oh so gorgeous guy selling ice-cream.

He was holding what looked like a basket of Wall’s ice-cream all the while trying to hold back a girl from leaving while the girl giggled shyly.

He was a dream and I looked at Karen and she was wide eyed looking at that delicious contraption we call Ice-cream Man. “Kenapa dia tak nak jual ice-cream dekat kita ?” I asked while Karen said at the very same time, “Mak aiii…. Handsomenya !”

Luqman said, “Kesiannya handsome-handsome jual ice-cream. Kalau kat Malaysia dah jadi Anuar Zain.”

Keh keh.

We saw 1 katoy. Only 1 !!! But then again that was because the taxi driver helpfully identified him. I wouldn’t know he was one until the driver outed him. Thus I wouldn’t know if the beautiful, beautiful ladies I saw were actually … well, ladies.

After that it was work.

And then the clients took us out for dinner at this simply marvelous place called Cabbages and Condoms. They even provided free condoms for us to take home but I was too shy to indulge. Hehehehhe….

Then more work.

And work.

And work.

Sigh…….

Hari yang boring so aku cari pasal

I want to write but I dunno what to write about.

Life is biasa aje… nothing special happening, nothing to rant or rave about either… well.. that is the biggest lie if ever there is one. I have tonnes to rant and rave about.. Cuma I ada sedikit malu untuk cerita.

Work… well… is nice. I loooveee my work… Cuma…. Well, there is always a but, kan ?
Health ? So-so. Still fat because can’t use my legs. Still short because ubat bagi tinggi belum siap and bottled lagi. Ubat tahan gila well… because I am afraid the Doc would put me straight in an institution rather than giving me pills.

So you see…. A bit difficult kan ?

In conclusion… it is very clear that I am bored. Untuk sengaja mencari pasal last night I asked my husband if he thinks I am fat.

He gave me a cursory glance and said, “No.”

Please… I begged him. I would really like to know the truth. Sometimes my size 12 (UK size okay… UK size !) trousers rasa longgar and sometimes not. Kembang kempis macam hidung my dad when he is lying.

He looked at me again, steeled himself to say, “Berisi lah…..”

Damn. I of course duly reminded him of my useless leg. Seriously lah.. all this weight came about because of my gammy leg, which is refusing to heal properly I must add. And not that doughnut I ate just now.

Or that hot chocolate with ice (which I tried to persuade my colleagues is different from iced chocolate. One colleague said, “I am not going to ask for hot chocolate with ice, Cik Puan when they already have iced chocolate !”) I had Monday.

Or the roast beef I made yesterday, simply drowning in gravy. How could gravy be fattening ? It is liquid !

To further dip him in hot soup, I asked, “You malu tak nak jalan dengan I ? You slim aje….and you are walking with a fat git…”

“Tak delah…” was the very expected reply.

Boring ! Must add some spice to our conversation so I said, “It’s okay, Kamil. You can tell me the truth… If you malu jalan dengan I because the size of my butt I perfectly understand (at this point he shook his head..) because to tell you the truth, I sometimes malu nak jalan dengan you sebab kepala you licin dan bersinar …..”

Now I get the reaction that I wanted because he narrowed his eyes, lips thin and out came his hand to push my head.

And I laughed as I ducked in victory.

Nice.

Anyway, tadi we went to buy cat food and my husband said, “Ini Moggy punya favourite…”

“Oh really ?” I looked at him skeptically and asked, “He told you ?”

Hehehe... malu pulak dia. Yang best dengan laki aku ni he could be so cute when he is dumbfounded and was trying his darnest to get his bearings again. He was really lost for words this time because he kept going, “Aaa…. Aaa…. Aaa…..”

Then, a lame “Adik you pun bagi kucing dia makan brand ni….”

He he…okay lah, okay lah…. Saja je nak mengusik.

LP

So... continuing on my story about my Dad and the things he did to pass the time while driving, remember last time along Federal Highway, just before Motorola where the row of shops are, there was once a furniture store called LP there, as in Lampu and Perabut ?

And they hds this huge LP sign high atop their roof which we can see from afar ? Remember that one ?

Well.. whenever we passed that shop Dad would start to ask what else could LP stands for ? And they must be connected, must have a link the L and the P, just like Lampu and Perabut.

That was fun. The challenge to think of something new was exciting. When Dad first asked, we were shouting the answers but as time passed and we could not think of anything else, everytime we passed by that damn shop we would quiet down and started thinking.

Even now when the shop is already gone, I still try to come up with something new.

Some of the LPs we thought of,

Longkang and Parit

Lantai and Penyapu

Lansuyaq and Pontianak

Lempang and Penampaq

Laut and Pantai

Lepat and Pisang

Laici and Pulasan

Laser and Pistols...

and a hoard of other stuffs that I have forgotten about.

Good huh ?

Can any of youy come up with a new one ? And not just new but a really clever one like my favourite, Lempang and Penampaq.

Down memory lane again

So… I watched a bloody good Malay drama on TV9 yesterday.

Sedih tau…. About Abang, Kakak and Adik. Good acting by that girl who sounded stupid talking in Malay who was Adik, Nor Khairiah I think her name is as Kakak and the Abang … well… mamat yang dalam cerita Melayu best masa bulan puasa tu yang si Kamil suka giler tu… Nama cerita I dunno. Sorry….

Anyway… the direction is good le… I like the way that flashbacks were narrated with the help of still photographs. Uber, uber refreshing. Although the cerita is a bit cliché… I mean I know what was going to happen at the end 20 minutes into the story but still… it didn’t make me shudder in geli-ness at all. Amazing ain’t it ?

I sms-ed Kamil and asked him to watch it and as soon as the story ended (like I knew how it would), Kamil called and a wailing me answered. Benci !!!!!!

As soon as I hung up with him, keluar pulak Usrah. You know the Islamic talk show with the ustazah with that amazing voice, mendayu-dayu mengaji. I tell you her mengaji is really mesmerizing.

Anyway, Ustazah for some reason started berpantun (with Kak Pah) and heheheh…………… it reminded me of something that happened dulu-dulu.. which is very typical of me. I am predictable.. I know.

Anyway… ha ha… it reminded me of the time when I started dating Kamil…when … we err….used to berpantun…together-gether.

I know .. It sounded so ludicrous.. I mean we dated in the 90s and not the 40s but berpantun we did last time.

Okay… it started innocently enough. I can think of a pantun really fast. Not because I was clever but just because I was trained by my Dad. My Dad used to force us kids to make up pantuns whenever we were in the car (plus sajak and syair and a hoard of other stuffs, I kid you not… of which I will tell more later…).

Whoever tak dapat buat pantun kena cubit dengan semua orang. Who wants that ? There were 8 of us and to be pinched by 7 people, simultaneously, is horrific, okay.

When any of us couldn’t make up a pantun fast enough, my Dad would shout “Jom cubit dia !!!!!” (gleefully, I must add) and the poor guy would be descended upon all his/her siblings’ outstretched hand, going “Waarrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhh !!!” Sound effects mesti ada punya. At times aku rasa my Dad just wanted to main cubot-cubit aje.

All right… not all the times kena cubit…sometimes kena boo or kena gelak berdekah2 tapi when that happened, badan tak sakit.. but hati membara…. Hhehehe… And yang selalu kena were us the big ones… The small ones on account of their age never get to make up pantuns but they get to pinch us… So unfair...

Anyway… I was used to it (plus my dad's method gave me no choice but to be good at it)and I just wanted to test if he can really think on his feet, you know. But… who knew… heheheh…. I mean… I had always loved it… I love pantuns… but it never entered my mind that it could be sooo romantic when I exchanged them with Kamil.

Admittedly he was slow…. Heheheh…. but….he was sweet… making up pantun about my nose (which he called buttony… now sadly he called insignificant…), about my other good points (which had mysteriously vanished from his mind as he could only think about my not so good bits now).. and it was sweet.

It made me giddy for days afterwards… and loose my sleep over as I relieved every word and every tone he used. Sadly I couldn’t even remember what it was now… his pantun that I used to hafal macam hafal sifir…apart from the subject matter. And even that one is a bit hazy.

So… that was that. Kamil and I…. berpantun during our courtship… Kat 7-11 seksyen 6. Me with muka berminyak, and my usual t-shirt and knee-length shorts. Him with his... err.... Dr. Mahathir's specs.... Eh tak lah... I think masa tu he had changed to a more acceptable wire-rimmed glasses.

I think.


Kuang, kuang, kuang.

We go AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW………………………

I am away from home again today and I miss my children. Funny how when they are not around all I can think about is how sweet they are….. He heh….

Like when I went to Mom’s house one day and Mom, my sister and I decided to go out in Mom’s car. I was to leave my own car at Mom’s and before we go to our destination, we sent Adik and her cousin E to my house first.

Upon hearing our plan, Adik quickly went inside my car and grabbed E**t, Abang’s toy giraffe before jumping into Tok’s car.

“Yang kau sibuk dengan E**t tu kenapa ?” I asked her because it is Abang’s, not hers.

“Ohh… I know you will be late and nanti Abang will miss E**t……” she said.

Awww………………….. So sweet…so thoughtful. I was soooo touched and vowed not to be too hard on her … which of course was short lived.

And then there was this one time when Kamil and I went to the movies without them. Come 9.30pm, she called me and said, “Mum…mee (I love it when she called me like that… ), saya nak tidur dah…. Good night, darling and please don’t come home late….”
I went awww………… the whole night, relieving her words and her sweet voice over and over again. To Kamil she sms-ed a picture of a person sleeping with a message, “Good night Bah”. Hehehhehehee…

Last weekend Kamil and I went furniture hunting and of course Abang didn’t want to come so it was just the 2 of us plus the little Clown. Her ears were plugged to the earphones, listening to songs but somehow she could hear her father teasing me. Suddenly Kamil received an sms and it was his daughter from the backseat saying, “Abah ni merepek lah”. Hehehhehe….. how cute can she get ?

And on that same trip, Kamil and I found a cute frame with “The princess is asleep. Please do not disturb” written within on a pink background. They also have the same one for the prince in pale blue background and we bought both.

Kamil thought it was a waste to buy that for Abang as Kamil was sure Abang won’t appreciate it but ….. before Abang went to sleep, he grabbed the sign and took it upstairs with him. While he was in the loo, I hung it at his curtain hook. When he saw it, he gave this huge mega-watt smile and went, “Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww…………………………” proving to me that he is still a baby after all.

Aww………… my babies !!!

Valentine's Day

Very funny lah... I still have some of the flu I got from the karaoke session and today I woke up with a new full blown one.

Sakitnya kepala, dengan hidung sumbat and mata berair and been sneezing.

I am in front of my mom right now, writing this while watching her barbecuing succulent chickens. Can't smell much but am inhaling the smoke. Oh.. but I can smell the durian my sister is eating next to me, though. Bosan.

Made cookies for Kamil's niece tadi. And then some for my family plus some cheesecake, leftover from yesterday's tarts.

Oh... last weekend Adik asked me when is Valentine's Day ?

"Valentine's Day tu apa ?"

"Ohh.... it's a day for your boyfriend..." She answered immediately. What ? I asked, saja je. But she got embarrassed pulak and just smiled without answering. I pressed for an answer and finally Abang yang jawab.

"Valentine's Day kan Mummy is a day where couples, adults... like you two have a romantic dinner....Dia orang macam show how much they love each other lah......"

OOOOhhhh.... he he....

"Allah suruh ke kita celebrate Valentine's Day ni sebab I didn't know about this ...."

"Errr.... maybe not lah.... I think people in England lah yang celebrate....."

Heheheh.....

"Oohh... then kalau Allah tak suruh tak payah lah kita celebrate okay ? Kita cuma buat apa yang Allah suruh aje..... Yang Allah tak suruh tak payah lah...."

"Eleh...." sambung Babahnya. "Mummy ngan Abah everyday have dinner together so we celebrate Valentine's Day everyday then....."

Yalah... said Abang and smiled ruefully.

"So... kalau Abah and Mummy keluar Valentine's Day together korang bagilah ? Just the two of us have dinner ?" Kalau depa dah besaq tu mesti kata how contradictory we were.

"No !" Adik answered immediately.

"Adik.... biar lah... Usually Valentine's Day people get babies !!" Abang hissed angrily.

Errrr.......... I think I need to hear the full version of his understanding of Valentine's Day...

Anyway... Kamil tengah tertonggeng-tonggeng barbecuing a huge lobster. Dia bawak satu aje lepas tu tak nak share so my siblings sepakat suruh dia bakar sendiri... Hehehhe... padan muka.

Okay peeps... nak makan.

10 sen

Today Kamil's sister ada buat kenduri doa selamat sikit. I promised her tarts so after sending my kids to their teacher, I walked across to get strawberries.

Dodged a few cars, walked on the row of shop's pavement and saw a shiny 10 sen lying on the floor.

I smiled as I walked past it as if I were younger, I would have picked it up and thought how lucky that day was for me.

And aku terus teringat dulu-dulu when the pasar malam at our area was just down the hill from our house. One night mom sent my big brother and I to the pasar malam quite late for something.

Anyway, it was really late as the vendors had started packing and some had already left. As we walked I suddenly stumbled upon a RM 5 note on the floor ! What luck !!! My brother and I were so happy and that started our little escapade to look for money (surely accidentally dropped from somebody's pocket). By 9 pm we would sneak out of the house and begin our mission.

Both of us would walk slowly, heads down carefully scanning the road, pushing the garbage with our feet in hope of exposing any treasures hidden.

We got lucky sometimes, the rest of the times we came back empty handed but it was fun. Sometimes we didn't even find money but stuffs that took our fancy... you know silly stuffs that were valuable to scavenging kids. Sometimes CT would follow us, drinking from her bottle all the while.

When I think about it now... My God how dangerous that was !!!! We were exposed to so much danger, all kinds of it. I am sure up until now Mom doesn't have an inkling of our nightscapades. I am sure she would have had the heebeejeebees if she had known.

Well... it is better if she didn't.

So... that was what the sight of a 10 sen coin reminded me of. It reminded me that I had quite a nice childhood.

Fish and chips and highways and fevers ...

Yesterday Ian took us for dinner at a British pub for a lip smacking fish and chips. It was good.

Ian picked me up at my office in Subang, then not 2 minutes after that we were stuck in a massive traffic jam. So he entered Putrajaya, then took the MEX highway, exited at Jalan Tun Razak and we arrived at Kamil’s office like 40 minutes after that.

Amazing isn’t it ?

Anyway the fish was superb. The chips were too good to be true. I had the barramundi which was nice and flaky and yummy.

The ambiance was very pub-like… what with the noise and all …but it is a pub so if you are looking for a more intimate dinner, don’t go. I like it, though.

I am still not well. I think I have the longest coughing bout in history. I have been coughing for almost 2 months now. That is according to my colleagues who apparently have been keeping tabs on my health.

Last week after Adik recovered and I was well enough to go to work, Abang got infected. His is much worse though as we had to rush him to the hospital on account of his high fever and he was getting quite delirious.

He slept with us for 2 nights which was unpleasant what with his girth. Oh yeah… his GP said he has to lose weight the next time he sees him which is next month. But when we weigh him at the hospital, he has put on 2 kg.

Yikes. What am I going to tell the doc ?

I have been having headaches for 2 days straight. Tummy also not very good.

Not a good February at all, is it ?

Ciao !

This is my cry for help....

Hai.... aku tension.

Had to lari from my bed sebab dah penuh dengan my admirers.

How lah to rest when all 4 of my kids, the human kind and those that hail from the animal kingdom, pun dok sekali ? Both humanoids dok bergaduh and then bersembang and then dok bergerak2 sampai katil bergoyang2. Tambah lagi pening kepala aku.

Yang the furries pulak dok tenyeh muka depa kat muka aku... I really don't know what they want from me. I mean, in Moggy's case, I am sure the kids can scratch him... but why is he insisting it to be me ? As I am writing this at the dining table, he is sleeping at my feet.

Yang bestnya yesterday morning before Kamil went to work he ordered his son to lift Moggy up to the bed (he can't perform any high jumps nowadays on account of his bad foot kan)because "Moggy tu nak tidur dengan Mummy....". What the.... So I was stuck with him who kept massaging me and sometimes out came his nails.

Adik pulak kept talking. And talking and talking until I had to tell her to stop because my head could not take all the incessant chatter.

Adding to my headache is her obsession with being British. She kept asking for hot tea and speaking in that ridiculous British accent. Her May I's is really getting on my nerve.

"Mummy rasa macam nak mati lah, Dik..." I said wearily.

"Oh... janganlah.... But if you do I just want your purple recipe book because I want to cook like you..."

Ada ke ? Really, dik ? And Abang of course le mengamuk sakan dengar Adik cakap macam tu and then they fought while Nosey meowed and meowed and Moggy purred on my chest.

I think I need to be admitted to the hospital.

The flu

I am sooo sick today.

I was sick 2-3 weeks ago. Ubat pun masih ada lagi. And now demam lagi.

Pening kepala.

We planned to go for a picnic yesterday but no go due to my condition. And Adik's. she has high fever too and keep vommitting.

I slept and slept and slept as all my medications induce sleep. For the flu, for the cough and for the fever. I believe my pening kepala now is more because of the many, many and continuous sleep than anything else.

Maybe because I am super stressed out. Usually the body losses it's defenses if you are stresses so that is why I have been sick.

Health is indeed wealth.

Take care.

Stock up on your vitamins to ward of sickness.