Jerawat

So nak dijadikan cerita, mata aku celik aje pagi tadi I was informed that Syabas buat perangai lagi. I closed my eyes with a weary sigh partly because of the thought of all the organising I need to do to ensure all 4 of us left the house to our respective destinations smelling of roses. The biggest part of my sigh was for Cik Abang Kamil nya.

Sesungguhnya aku adalah isteri yang sangat mengenali suami sebab belum sempat pun the sigh finished escaping from my self Kamil did the expected, he started ranting and raving. Dan sesungguhnya bermula lah episode kami anak beranak termasuk bibiknya sekali scrambling around the house, trying to match Kamil's barks and pace. Ini lah gamaknya barking mad, seperti cakap orang putih.

If explanation for his action is warranted, it is due to his utter abhorrence to be late. Pantang mak nenek dia. He always wants to be the person yang bukak office. Aku dah banyak kali dah pesan that he should just have changed his job to security guard shift malam sebab memang depa yang ada banyak peluang bukak office pagi-pagi. Orang lain susah sikit.

Anyway to speed things up, I ordered him to bathe at his mom's house with Adik while Abang and I do the deeds at CY's house. My husband left in a flurry of smoke and screeching tyres sehinggakan tertinggal his precious toilettries bag. Bibik handed the bag to me with muka yang sangat cuka and I accepted the bag with muka yang double cuka sebab sah-sah lah aku yang kena bagi menatang tu kat dia.

Tak sempat a fresh new sigh escaped my lips, he rang. And with a voice 2 octaves higher diselang-seli dengan sighs of frustration suruh aku bawak aje bag tu to CY's house.

Why he made me feel like it is my fault the house has no water ?

And for the umpteenth time in the past 30 minutes I asked myself, "kenapa aaa aku kawin dengan orang ni ?" Waaaaaaa !

Anyway belum sempat aku mandi and while Abang walked to school with MI, he came over to the house to siap. Then he left to send Adik to school aku pun melepaklah kejap dengan adik-adik. Sekali dia call. Lepas menyoal aku kaw-kaw kenapa aku tak pegi keje lagi, he announced that he is coming over to use the toilet. Cess.

Pastu boleh lah melepak sampai pukul 9 to play with our nephew. Sabar ajelah. Rasa macam rugi aje moving at warp speed while a drill sargeant shouted at your ears pagi tadi.

Anyway he called me around 11 am to make peace. He didn't say as much for sure but I know him. As usual, because aku nak nasihat secara sindiran tentang perangai dia pagi tadi, I have to inject humour while doing that just in case if his mood is still not there. Sigh... penat tau nak kena buat strategic planning sampai macam tu sekali.

So... after the treet treet of my phone, I answered with;

Me : Laaa... panjang umur you, Kamil. I baru aje mengumpat you dengan ZAK.

Him : Ye ke ? You ngumpat apa ?

Me : Alah... benda biasalah. You tak hensem, dah lah botak... Pastu suka marah-marah orang....

Him : Mana ada. I baik apa...... Mana ada I marah orang

YA RABBI !!! Memang sajalah aku tak terguling pengsan masa tu....

Me : Banyak lah you... I tak tau lah macamana staffs you belum bomohkan you lagi...

Him : Why would they want to do that ? I am nice person...

Me : Podah ! Pagi tadi marah I, marah Abang, marah Adik... Dengan Bibik sekali you marah... Macam lah kita orang kerja dengan Syabas... Bibik tu lagi lah... Dia kerja ngan you... You yang bayar gaji.... Apasal lak kita orang kena marah bila takde air...

Him : Pagi tadi ? Mana ada ? You cakap apa ni ? Mana ada I marah ?

Me : Pagi tadi.. yang you mengamuk sakan ngan kita orang..

Him : What are you talking about ni ? I mana ada marah...

Me : You are really going that way are you ?

Him : Yes.

Oh sungguh selamba badak.

So... Selepas membaca petikan di atas, don't anybody dare ask me why I have so many zits on my face. Okay ?