Tuesday, June 29, 2010


I’d better write my weekend entry before I nod off to sleep.

I had forgotten what we did on Friday… My memory is really bad, you all. Maybe as my writing progresses I will remember.

Anyway, Saturday after class went to see DR and her perbelanjaan di Vietnam. Aku pun turut berbelanja walaupun aku tak pi. Perangai sangat teruk. DR’s partner M opened up the shop for me and what a lovely lady she is. I like her instantly.

I really have no idea why my kids that day were brave enough to ignore my requests for them to park their butts nicely on the floor. Round and round and round they went chasing each other and laughing like they have never laughed before and proceeded to knock one whole rack of clothes.

Gedebum semuanya jatuh ke tanah.

Kak M was sooo baik hati, she kept assuring me that everything is fine, that her own children are like that too but… oh Kak M… thank you for your kind words but I am sure your anak-anak is more well-mannered than mine.

My kids were safe from the effects of my wrath and transformation menjadi hantu thanks to kak M also. Ha ha…

Roasted beef for lunch (mat sallehs ada Sunday roasts.. me I have Saturday ones…. He he…), mashed some potatoes and boiled mixed vege. Easy. Baked a cake for a customer, just chocolate sponge cake without any toppings which was easy then bersiap sedia untuk pi swimming.

Oh before that sent Bibik to meet her daughter at kak M’s house. On the way back I got a call that informed me Kamil’s birthday present was ready. Yahoo !! Went to pick them up and seperti biasa si Kamil pantang aku lambat sikit, dah call buat spot check.

I don’t know lah why I was sooo stupid to take his presents out of the car when I know he is inside the house. Wanted to secret it upstairs but Kamil saw me tercangak-cangak depan pintu. Because he is busybody tahap Gaban, he came out to see what was wrong. Terpaksa lah bagi teruih. Sorry babe tak sempat nak surprise kan you Khamis ni. Luckily he loves it so that is what that matters most, yeah ?

Nak keluar rumah I asked the kids to make a lot of racket so Uncle S could see that we were taking them out so that should be okay, right ? We swam for awhile and while we were there, I made a conclusion that my son is loud. Nobody could surpass his decibels at the pool, okay.

Had dinner at Tram Car then home to sleep. I am old as I cannot take late nights anymore. The body aches so… he he..

As you know from my last entry there was no tennis class and hikmah disebaliknya ialah because of that I had the chance to offer my neighbourly and Islamic duty to A. We spent the whole day in the house upon our return from the graveyard. I made fish and chips, and then bake 2 cakes for F’s tahlil that night.

Before we took the kids out for dinner, sent the cakes to the grieving widow with our regrets because we were unable to join the tahlil. Kamil had to drive to Setiawangsa for work and he needed me to accompany him on the long ride to KL. Plus I am useful as a map reader. Ha ha….
We raced home to catch the all important England game only to be disappointed by their… well… whatever lah. They played real bad, okay ? Defense is seriously lacking without Rio and the pitch looked ugly without Beckham.. Ha ha… Giggs, please play for England !!!!!!! They need you, bro.

Then sleep.

Ta-ra !

PS : I now remember Friday. I was fasting and wanted to break it with Yong Tau Foo from pasar malam. Kamil insisted that I wait for him to come home so that, “kita pegi pasar malam sama-sama, okay…” and then together-getherlah pick the kids up from their class. Konon.
Keluaq office pukui 6.45 pastu got stuck in the jam. Beria suruh aku keluaq awai ni … tapi dia ? Last-last tak pi pun pasar malam sebab dia yang sudah anticipate aku akan naik angin tak berani call awai-awai nak habaq dia lambat…

Kesudahanya bila dia berani nak bagitau yang dia dia tak sempat at the 11th hour, dah tak sempat dah aku nak pi pasar malam. I just went to pick up the kids and buka dengan chocolate milk.

Hangpa rasa mana aku lagi angin. Bagitau awai2 or bagitau masa bilal dah test-test sora nak azan ?? Nasib baik posa. Tak ter-menjadi hantu aku petang tu.

As an olive branch, he took me to Kuting Besar aka Seafood Restaurant terapung after Maghrib. I want Yong Tau Foo only lah !!!!

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Cerita sedih hari Ahad....

This morning as we were about to go out, I peered over Uncle S, the neighbor in front of us to make sure he didn’t see us in the midst of doing what he advised us not to do too much.

The sky opened up a bit therefore no tennis for the kids but we were already ready to go at 7.50 am. Kamil ajak pegi Sungai Buloh to get … errm… more hardy plantation to make our house into a home. Penting tu…

Anyway, we took our time choosing the plants, and we chose many, had breakfast and was subsequently greeted with loads of cars parked on our street. So many there were some made it quite hard for us to enter into our home.

“Sapa kawin pagi-pagi ni ?” Asked Kamil.

I though felt uneasy for some reason. I think there is death instead of kawin. I could tell from the way the cars were parked, haphazard and many blocked our other neighbour’s gate.

Due to our house being high up, as we drove up our driveway I saw quite a few people milling about at the end of the road. None was dressed up. Most men were in t-shirts with head covered. Sah lah ada orang meninggal.

I ran to the fence to try and get a better look. “Who died ?” Kamil asked.

“I don’t know… “ I said. One guy walking from the direction of the crowd helpfully fed us with the news. Tuan rumah no. X passed away.

Oh dear, oh dear. Kamil and I quickly went over to the house where we were greeted with most of our neighbours plus uncle S who looked at us with a small smile and said, “You are late…” Okaylah, okay lah….

I hugged A, the wife who was calmly crying at the door. Jenazah dah siap mandi and was just waiting for the van. The deceased’s next door neighbour, whose Dad’s wedding we missed called Kamil’s name in relish. Well, he was the one who alerted the other neighbours and yet again was met with our empty house so maybe he thought we have moved or saja tak nak kawan… he he…..


At times like this, I am again made aware of my lack of social grace. I had nothing to say to A apart from I am sorry as I hugged her sobbing self and asked when he passed. I have no heart to ask the gory details of his passing, so I withdrew from her immediately. I mean, I suppose I can offer comforting words to soothe the broken heart but… well seriously, I don’t want to muddle her head even further. She is grieving and to force her to politely hear my inane chatter is cruel.

That is what I think, at least. As I said, I know I lack social grace and really have no idea what to do. To me, the best is just to keep quite and offer smiles. I really don’t know how other people does it, okay. I seriously kena berguru dalam hal-hal macam ni.

Since that was what I had to say to her, our meeting was brief. Very. So short it was Uncle S missed it and as I was waiting outside the house with some of the guests, he approached me. “You dah jumpa A ke ?”


He looked at me. Okay, okay no need to make me feel bad. “Pergi lah tanya dia if malam ni ada tahlil ke… Uncle pun nak tahu…..”

He he… I really appreciate what he is trying to do but I just feel that you know this is not the best time to do it. She is sobbing right there for heaven’s sake. But obedient I am so I went inside and salam-ed (shaking hands is not the same as our more softer and meaningful salam I think…) the ladies inside. Husband is a convert so I was really touched to see so many of his relatives in the house. Alhamdulillah.

A was sitting on a short stairs in her living room, surrounded by relatives sorting out papers. Dengan berat hati aku pi jugak tanya. Nasib baiklah she could offer me smiles by that point and luckily it was already planned.

But, tak sempat nak bagitau Uncle S my mission was successful as the van jenazah arrived soon after.

You remember me mentioning I lack social grace ? Well… that is soooo very apparent with me being the only lady in jeans and t-shirt. I didn’t even think that I should have changed to a more appropriate clothing.

Anyway, we quickly went home to change.. well I went home to change, sent the kids to my mom’s then we raced to the graveyard. A was sooo grateful that we joined them there, she hugged me many, many times.

Well… I try to do my best.

Of course dah kat situ, I can’t not visit Shera. As we walked to her grave as soon as F’s service was over, I already cried buckets. When I see her resting place, I think I almost keeled over from grief. It will be 2 years next month and I don’t think my pain has lessened at all. My sedekah of Yaasin to her was my minimal best because it was inundated with my woeful sobs.

When will this feelings stop ? When will I be better ? Will I get better ?

I hope A and her children will handle this better than we do.

Al-fatihah to F.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Kena marah kat supermarket

You guys tahu tak aku yang dah besaq-besaq ni kena marah sebab selalu tak dak kat rumah ?

He he….

Morning while I was just looking around a supermarket while the kids were trying to be Beethovan, I bumped into a neighbor. Chatted awhile then we went our separate ways. Not 5 minutes after that, I heard “You nampak my wife tak ?”

Turned to the voice and saw the neighbours husband asking the supermarket worker. Udah… I thought. Uncle ni buat perangai pulak dah…

Bukanlah perangai apa but they are our elderly neighbor and I thought Uncle ni dah start nanyuk pulak. I tapped him on the shoulder and pointed to a direction where I last saw his wife. “Uncle, your wife kat situ….” When he looked at me I pointed to myself pulak. “Neighbour…” “Tahu !” he replied.

Then he starts.

“You all ni selalu takde rumah kenapa ? Pergi mana ?”

“Err….. kerja lah Uncle…”

“Kerja apa sampai malam-malam ? I selalu tak nampak Mazda you kat rumah…”

“Ye lah… I pergi kerja….”

“Ha…. Tapi bila Mazda ada rumah, Honda pulak takde pastu gelap…..”

“Ohh… ahahahahah” Habih, what else can I say ? I had a feeling he was lecturing me but I just can’t be sure.

“Selalu takde rumah tau…..”
“I sekarang buat audit, Uncle…”

“So what ? Balik lah rumah… Duduk kat rumah….”


“You dah kenal dah your new neighbor ?”

“Eh.. dahhh….” Nasib baik dah. I know if I said I don’t mesti kena lagi.

“Wife dia kerja kat X and husband dia kerja kat Y….”

“Yes, yes I know… Uncle dah jumpa ke ?”

“Dah… masa kenduri kawin Datuk S… hujung jalan ni ha… You all tak pegi…”

“Ohh … tak…”
“Itulah sebab selalu not at home….”

“Dia tak jemput pun Uncle… kalau jemput we surely go punya….”

“Ehh…. Don’t say that….” Menjeling dia… I gulped.

“Anak dia datang personally jemput all the neighbours. He asked about you all I kata you all selalu takde rumah…..”

“Heheheh…. Ye ke…..”

“Ingat ni… kalau kita selalu tak de rumah, merajuk rumah… terbang dia nanti….” Was his parting shot.

I heard myself said, “Okay, okay… kita orang tak keluar lah selalu lagi…..”

And exhaled.

Tu dia haii…………

Rasa macam mak aku marah sebab selalu sangat keluaq mengukuq jalan…..

But… what he says is right. Maybe we should stay at home more.

I told Kamil and he laughed.

I laughed.

Nak kata kecik hati, tak lah pulak. Orang tua, memang macam tu…. Plus he wasn’t rude and I know he means well…. There is some truth in what he said anyway…

HE eheheheheh…

Thursday, June 24, 2010

What is becoming of the world

Just now an ol’ male friend told me of devastating news. Nothing morbid no… no one was struck with ill-fortune either. Just our mutual friend’s perangai tak senonoh.

“Ko kenal dia rapat ke ?” he asked before he told me of his problems with her.

“Kenal ? Lebih dari kenal… Aku dulu main longkang, panjat-panjat pokok dengan dia lah….”

He sighed and my curiosity was more than piqued.

Al-kisah, she who is now an ibu tunggal wanted to get it on with my friend yang masih ada bini and 4 anak. And I mean, really get on. Boleh dikategorikan menyerahkan diri dengan rela kat mamat yang clearly tengah ketakutan ni.

Then was I know what it meant to be floored.

As he told his story, I kept seeing her when we were small. Meeting her at her house. Main lumpur. With her elder brother merayau waktu raya. I remember one raya, a friend invited us to her house for raya. “Mak saya bagi 2 ringgit tau !!” The girl boasted so kita orang apa lagi, petang tu jugak sampai.

2 ringgit 15 years ago is a lot, okay ? A lot !

So we went in and when we waved goodbye to them, we each had 2 kupang in our hands. “Huh kata 2 ringgit. 2 posen !” my friend fumed and gave me her 2 kupang. She and her brother hated coins so I that day I got 6 kupang… ha ha… !

Anyway… hai…

We sort of like went our separate ways maybe when we were 11. Eventhough we go to the same sekolah menengah… we didn’t socialise much. We were friendly though.

Then, she …. Erm… joined a cult…. And started to look at people one kind. I remember bumping into her at Kompleks PKNS. I was happy to see her after not seeing her for ages since she moved to another school. Her reaction to my greetings though were surprising cool. SO cool in fact my bounced disappeared.

Of course after eons of not thinking about her, some clever dude created FB and we got connected again. And then this. This story of her trying to get another woman’s husband to stray.

There were a few meetings which the guy admitted he went as friends, like he added, what you and me are doing now. Then, she invited him to go with her on a holiday. Sans their kids and his wife. This tudung clad girl wanted to have a holiday with someone else’s husband, together-gether. Like “Tiada orang lain hanya kita berdua sayang…” kind of thing.

“Don’t worry… “ she assured him. “We take 2 different rooms…” You need to spell that out.

I can’t concentrate on my work after that. I was very disturbed. She joined a bloody cult before, you know. One of the first to cover herself. Even in her FB she talked about Allah a lot. Always giving advises on how to live the Islamic way. Kat Genting takde Allah ke ? Let me tell you this lah okay. She is one of the last person I thought would do such a thing like this. To me, she is virtuous habis lah. I am such a fool.
Bodoh !!!

How did she become like this ? She herself is a divorcee and can’t she relate on how unhappy his wife would be if she finds out about her ? Luckily my friend didn’t take the bait but if he did ? What does she plan to do with his wife ? Why must she put that poor unsuspecting lady in her position ? The kids ? He has 4 ! FOUR !

He told me that after their second so-called date, she asked about his feelings for her. Apara… tak malu ke ? Bak kata kawan aku, “Katakan lah aku nak menjual pun, tak sempat okay sebab dia dah jual dulu…. “ he he….


She is really giving jandas a bad name lah. I will have to keep my husband under lock and key now. She is forbidden to enter my house and life. He he….

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Weekend ku as usual...

Okay.. I’d better blog about my last weekend before I forget what happened…and before the next weekend come rolling…

Thursday night we went to buy tickets for Toy Story 3. Memandangkan I was fasting, bought the 10 pm ticket so sempatlah I broke my fast at my mum’s. Mum made mee bandung and cok udang. What could be better than that ?

But then I think that coq udang goes well with chicken ala kiev even… Ha ha….

Balik for a quick Maghrib and after Isyak we shot off to CineLeisure. Ramainya orang toksah cerita lah. It was sooo hard for us to find parking we had to leave the car at The Curve. Throngs of people milled about and more cars were still coming in so really it was amazing considering the late hour.

Oh ! I managed to buy a pair of glittery red shoes… They are so pretty to look at….

Before the movie started, I asked Kamil whether he was interested to watch Woody and Buzz. He shook his head and I nodded mine in agreement saying, “I am preparing myself to sleep….” How wrong I was. The movie was good. I was captivated from the very beginning. The beautiful animation and those vibrant colours. Plus the storyline wasn’t too shabby either. I kept my eyes opened because I had wanted to know what was gonna happen next and then… it made me cry. Sure I laughed a lot during the course of the movie but at the end, Woody and Andy made me cry. It was soooo…bittersweet.


Keluaq aje from the wayang, we bought tickets for The A-Team.. He heh……

I don’t have to describe our Saturday morning because it was our typical Saturday morning. Roasted chicken which my family picked to the bones, eaten with very yummy gravy… Serious… so yummy it was Kamil asked, “Resepi sapa you guna ?” I of course took it no other way than him hinting that my gravy before that Saturday afternoon sucked.

Dah start chom. Senang saja hati nak terguris. Oh !

By 3 pm we made a move to CineLeisure again and had a smashing time watching Hannibal and his crazy team. Abang said it was “AWESOME !” Adik had no opinion because there were no hunks that took her fancy. Merepek. Bradley Cooper is superbly delicious… Sigh… Nasib baik tak posa. Saja batai satgi…

Kamil wanted to buy more tickets but I wouldn’t let him because there was nothing else to watch. Besides my butt ada macam kematu sket…. Dinner at Tony’s where I had one of the most unappetizing mee kari in the history of my life. I hate tasteless calories from the santan that entered my body so easily but so hard to shift. Kalau sedap takpa gak… Rogi saja…

Malam I baked 2 butter cakes for a client. While baking Shazmi and Nadia came and we had a nice time chatting. They left almost 2 am I think.. So that was a lot of stories exchanged.

Sunday after leaving the kids with their coach, Kamil and I swung by Pasar Tani. Kamil wanted to look for plants in his attempt to beautify our very, very humble house but aku yang pi borong herbs. I found sage that I will tumbuk2 and lumuq on my next roast chicken. I can just imagine the taste…. Hmmm…………

I was sooo interested to buy Vanilla plant that was on sale because I love using the pods for baking and… this is the plus point, ianya adalah pokok menjalar…. Err…. I dunno if that term is correct. Err… pokok yang menjalaq ke ataih… yang lilit-lilit tu lah… Kalau menjalaq tu macam menjalaq kot bawah macam tembikan tu kan ? I don’t know the English word for it… he heh…

Anyway, I had always loved pokok menjalaq ke ataih tu and finding one that gives me Vanilla pods is like dream come true lah.. But….there is always a but in the story of my life… I am required to "mendebungakan pokok tu secara manual… Adik (adik kau….) temukan aje dua bunga tu.. … Senang aje..” It didn’t sound easy to me, it sounded complicated. Plus I was picturing the 2 flowers in kissing mode when he described it… so the pollen-isation of the vanilla flowers manually sounded a bit porn-ish to me….

Malu kat anak-anak… and my anak-anak are very impressionable.. Very….

Made keawtiaw sup for lunch. And baru aje katup api, Kamil got a call from my sister. Mom made nasik lemak with rendang was the khabar gembira. Bibik gelak tengok aku abandoned habih sup tu. Nasib baik Bibik prihatin and masuk semua dalam periuk and katup ngan tudung saji. Makasih bik.

We raced to Mum’s house sebab takut habih. Nasib baik cuma ada CY and MJ. Baru nak duduk CT and MD pun sampai. Nasib baik…... Lekaih, pulun sedak ! He he….

Makan and sembang and gelak and gossip and macam-macam lah.

Petang nak pi swimming tapi sampai-sampai aje kat kelab, pool boleh katup for renovation. I dunno how I knew it but before we left, I told Kamil “Jangan satgi kita pi tutup for renovation….” Wooo…. Tak meremang bulu rome bila pi and sungguh jadi ! Physchic giler aku okeh.. Lepaih ni nak beli crystal ball lah…

Abang and Adik somehow merajuk which baffled and irritated me because bukan aku yang suruh katup !!! Ni kita dah pi dah, depa yang katup ! Bukannya ada conspiracy theory Mummy suruh depa katup bila kita sampai. Mummy tak gila macam tu sekali, aih ! Sila pi mengamuk kat orang kat reception tu laen kali na ?

Had keawtiaw sup for dinner then we went to run some errands. Balik I soq and let me tell you, Monday for buka, I had Ketam Masak Lemak made by my mom. Soooo yummy Kamil, MJ, CT, CY and I makan tak hengat donia. Kamil punya dok pulun sampai luka mulut and jari…

UUhh… no pain, no good food passes your mouth……..

Sakit belakang tulih weii…..

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Sambungan cerita masalah aku...

Sorry…. Continuation of my story came very, very late…

Busy … And malas…

So to sambung, last Sunday afternoon Kamil woke up in a bad mood. Start merepek… muncung sedepa… naik angin satu badan.

When I asked why he gave me his standard answer, “Kenapa you bagi I tidur ?”. And really I do not know why I asked when the answer is expected. Bodoh aku lah… because everytime he says that, aku pulak angin satu badan.

Anyway as he was nursing his dark clouds, in entered Adik, all stroppy too… stomping her feet, muncung sedepa.

“Laa… baru bangun tiduq ka ?” I asked as she slumped next to her Babah.

“Asal bangun tiduq marah. Asal bangun tiduq marah…Toksah tiduq laen kali…”

And I looked at both at them with their matching muncungs, and matching sembam faces and I wondered, aku tadi marah sapa na ? before realization hits. “Ya Rabbi !!! Ni … ni ! Ni ikut perangai you lah ni… Tengok ni.. sama-sama bangun tiduq, sama-sama dok angin… Ha ! Ini gene YOU. Perangai ini dia dapat dari you, okay ?”

Kamil looked at Adik, then looked at me, sheepish grins on his face.

Ha…. Tau pun hang…

Gene aku saja mana jadi….

Suka !

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Aku ada macam-macam masaalah

Adik is a burper. No. Even the crass-ness of the word burper is too soft to describe her. I think the best way to describe her is kuat belahak.


Many a times we have told her to do it nicely. To do it delicately. Like a lady.

But no. She chose a more masculine way to let out gas. A lady’s burp would be devoid of sound and movement. Hers consists of a huge bellow coupled with a body that jerk forwards and mouth gaping open.


I know.. she is a little girl… but still… it doesn’t come out cute.

It has been a sore subject between us. We would tell her to quit it or at least control it and she would insist that it could not be controlled.

Really ?

Entah lah.

I possess no medical journals nor encyclopaedia to consult.

Anyway things got rather embarrassing for us when she lets out a satisfied belch in public. And the mutha of mortification happened.. oh.. last week during my birthday dinner. I tell you it was a disaster just waiting to happen.

We just ordered when I saw a guy looked at me in recognition. He and his family just came and was about to be shown to their table. I know him, he looked familiar but I just can’t place him anywhere. Until he smiled that gentlemanly smile and then I know. I waved and he waved back and approached us with his family in tow.

Now, this guy is a prince among men. He is a gentlemen. He and his boss are gentlemen. I have never seen persons so rich and titled and hold a high position in corporate Malaysia to be so humble and nice. These people are simply nice people.

How I know him ? My last project with my old boss was with them and I meet them regularly. Eventhough I am just a kuli, and he knows it, but he still regard me as a human deserving respect and therefore came to say hello.

Huh.. I know many people yang baru managerial level pun dah sombong Ya Rabbi but this guy is in the board of a huge and well known finance house in Malaysia. I will tell more about him and his boss in another entry.

Anyway, A came and we exchanged news about the project.. well since I left. He then asked about my kids and told us some about his and it was nice. My kids behaved, the small talk went without a hitch and he went to sit at a table behind us.

All was well. I was happy to see him because I do hold him in high regard and it was just really nice to see him again. Plus… well I was pleased that he remembers me. Kah kah…

Anyway, we ate and all and suddenly, “BELAHAK !!!!!!!”

Ya Rabbi !!!! Punya kuat sampai aku pun tersentak.

People at the next table laughed and I could hear A laughed. And his children. And his super gorgeous wife.

“Err… who did that ?” I asked, looking around trying to pass the blame to anybody, just anybody else in the restaurant and not that sweet looking girl in front of Kamil.

“ME !” My daughter confessed eagerly and I heard more laughter around us.

Oh dear. Habis my street cred, okay ? Hancus !!!

“Mummy .. your friend pun is laughing…” Said the little belcher happily, pointing her naughty finger at A whose seat faced us. My eyes widened some more and rasa nak titik titik je jari tuh.


How do you get up to leave after that ? With loads of courage my friends. Loads of them.


Anyway, Kamil and I talked about that for days. About Adik and her gas problem. We just couldn’t understand it because neither of us are like that.

Until my birthday dinner on Saturday that is when CY let out a huge belch while eating. The body jerk, the gaping mouth even the sound was akin to that of my daughter.

I gasped and prayed Kamil didn’t hear. He of course did and as I slowly looked at him with a wince and a guilty face, he was already looking at me with comprehension and understanding. How could I forget that CY has the same habit too ?

“Itu gene CY ! My God ! Adik got your family’s gene !!!!!”

I laughed and she laughed and he laughed with a bloody satisfied laugh and a bloody conceited face.

Adik’s father is free from the blame. And I have to shoulder the shame everytime dia buat perangai. Tak kuasa aku dengan kau CY woiii !!!!!!!!! Menyusah kan aku aje !! Kalau ya pun belahak lah lain kali… Jangan depan Kamil !!!!!


But don’t worry, Kamil’s smug face doesn’t last long. Something happened that allowed me to turn the table and blame his genes pulak.

To be continued.

Monday, June 14, 2010

Cerita weekend yang panjang berjela

So weekend huh ?

Hmm… Friday…. Friday…. Friday…. What happened ? Went to work sure but after that… Friday night.. Oh.. ha ha… We went to watch Karate Kid which you guys know I think is awesome. Because the show started at 10 pm, I had time to cook at home first. Kamil’s grateful face when he came home to burning stove and hot kitchen was pitiful.

Sorry, hon.

Saturday morning no tennis because nobody could open their eyes that early. Went to piano class, sent Abang home and then CY picked me and Adik up. Ana and Esya were already in the car.

Picked up CT and off we went to Ampang Park ! Yiihaaa !!!

We had lunch before going to the kedai kain for my baju raya. Penat aku datang awal as the promised kains belum sampai lagi. Upon calling the owner she asked for 20 minutes more so what did we do ? Took the LRT to KLCC. Best.

However sampai aje depan RotiBoy I realised that we, all of us, have made a grave error. “CY ! Kita datang KLCC pakai baju Ampang Park !!!” I said in horror.

Waaa ! Malunya as all of us were so sempoi ! I was in a tatty t-shirt and old cardi. CY pun was in selebet t-shirt and jeans. CT lagi… baju kelawar…. Kah kah…. Even the kids were selebet but what to do. We were there already.

Ha ha.. !

Anyway, we went to Zara and each sister bought a top. Mine is super cute. To all tudung wearing readers, sila ke Zara as this season banyak baju ala-ala Muslimah.

Went back to Ampang Park to choose my kain but what a disappointment. Among the newly delivered kains, I only found 1 that I like. One !! And the one Kamil likes from last week was gone. He he….

Balik Shah Alam to send the kids home before we head to the newly opened Jakel in Shah Alam. Cengginilah… I don’t think I will go again because the kedai was so semak, the crowd too sardine-y and the kains were not much to talk about. We came out of the shop empty handed but added pening kepala.

Okay probably if we go on a weekday and the shop was not that packed, we would have probably had a better chance to have a proper look around. Probably.

Anyway came home all kenyang from apam balik tak sedap we bought depan Jakel. It sucked so please don’t even think about it, kay ?

Surprisingly Kamil wasn’t hankering for food. Aku tunggu gak dia start nak bising pasal aku keluar tak bagi dia makan. But he was shtoom. Even the kids were not demanding for sustenance.

Until 9 pm and my sister called to say “Datang lah rumah Mum. Mum marinade ayam and dia buat barbeque… Tiba-tiba aje….Dia suruh datang aku datanglah...” Pulak. Ini bukan ajak-ajak ayam.. but ajak-ajal defensive. My suspision was piqued.

Hmmm….. then I know.

Kamil lak sibuk nar tanya who called. “CT… Mummy buat barbeque…” Said I, as nonchalant as possible. But this guy is not a good actor as his muka purak-purak tak tahu showed that he actually tahu.

“Ada birthday party I ke ?” I tried.

“Ha ? Tak tahu pun… Mana ada !” Hidung start kembang… Lagi sure sign dia tengah kelentong.

“Iya ? You tak bising pun pasal lapar ke, hapa ke….”

“I lapar lah… I tak makan satu hari tau….” Hmm… start dah…

“Kenapa tak makan. Dah besar pun tak reti nak cari makan ke ?”

“Hari kerja je I boleh… Sabtu Ahad I need you to feed me…” Gatal. Tadi elok aje…

So we drove to Mum’s house and the house smelt heavenly of burnt chicken and sweet marinade. I don’t care lah ada surprise party ke tak de ke, what is important my tummy was strangely empty again and I was ready to sink my teeth into a piece of chicken and tear a bit of flesh. Yumm !

Tengah syok-syok makan suddenly I saw Ian and Noreen came. Confused jap but as my mind was whirring to identify if my vision was indeed true, I acknowledged that they came to celebrate my birthday. The twosome presented with a very generous gift. I didn’t realize how generous it was until the next day though when I had the time to have a proper look.

Anyway, we ate and the cakes were taken out and even though there were 2 cakes, I didn’t get to blow any of the candles off. The kiddies and the ceiling fan got to it first.

As we ate, I dunno how the idea of tengok midnight came about and by 11.30 we were already home to change to wayang clothes (read : winter apparels). CY came to pick us up much to her annoyance because eversince she drives an mpv, everybody counts on her for a ride. Yelah.. dah keluarga ramai.. mpv is godsend, kay ?

However she moved to the back seat as soon as she saw Kamil… Turn Kamil pulak bengang.

We raced to MidValley and luckily we managed to get tickets for The Killers. It sucks if you want to know. Ashton Kutcher’s beauty could not save the movie. Not even Tom Sellecks dashing good looks could. Really, really bad movie.

We arrived home to an empty house because Bibik was away and the kids were sleeping over at my mom’s. I immediately went to bed but Kamil stayed up to watch football. England seri by the way. England sucks too.

Sunday was a bit relaxed. Well… not really as I brought work home. Sigh… I had to decline an order of 1 butter cake and 1 chocolate cake.

Lunch was at Tesco’s JM Briyani and then food shopping. Balik Kamil and I tried to catch back on our sleep from yesterday. Malam the kids wanted pizza so we took them there. Kamil and I didn’t have any because we were still full from lunch.

11.30 pm I sahur-ed and then sleep.

And then suddenly I found myself in the office again, re-reading my investigation report.

Did the weekend really happened ?


Sunday, June 13, 2010

I don't know what to write

So here I am trying to write something in my blog.

These past few weeks, every time I had a great idea for a blog entry, I’d be in no position to write. I willed and willed myself to remember whatever it was but I never did. When I am finally in front of the computer, my blog on the screen, my mind went blank. Very frustrating indeed.

Work is draining. I enjoy my new job, I like the challenge especially it is something I have never done before. I am supposed to be in training but because of unforeseen circumstances, I have to buck up and join in the forces for real. No training for me. Actual work is training.

But… I am struggling to do reports and presentations, their style. Just because well it is different. My old job requires different kind of reporting but this new one, well… it is simply different. But my boss seemed not to understand that I am new and thus needed time to learn. He also seemed to forget that I came with zero experience in this particular field so again I need time to learn. What he remembers is my senior position and kept reminding me of it.

Being with a super understanding boss for 6 years made me grossly unprepared to face and tackle the exact opposite of him.

Why did you leave him ? Asked my surprised colleague when we talked about our past experiences. Yeah… I am wondering why now.

Kah kah.. ! No… nobody is perfect. My old boss posed a different problem and that kind of shit I had to take leave from.

Kamil’s old boss once told him that there is no perfect workplace. Therefore we need reliable and trustworthy colleagues. Alhamdullilah, I think I found them in my team. It is early days yet to really be for sure but Insya-Allah I think I can count on them.

They take me in with open arms and were always telling me where I did wrong and always willing to teach me a few things or two. So for that, I offer my thanks to Allah SWT. I cannot have a perfect package all the time and I accept that.

By the way, before I got the offer I prayed and prayed to HIM to show me which was the best way to go and he gave me a clear sign that I have to follow this way. So I have to be patient because HE sorta indicated to me that this job would give a better future for me and my family.




Err… and I hope I read the signs right. Ha ha !

By the way. I had my birthday last Wednesday.

I came home to a dark house and saw candles being lighted thorugh the darkened window. Ha ha… traditional way for a surprise birthday party anywhere in the world.

I was touched because it was the type of cake I like but none of my family would ever touched with a 10-foot pole. Kamil kept asking where I wanted to go for dinner. I had no idea where but the kids shouted Sushi !

Urrghh ! Well…. I am 34 and I cannot have my own way when it comes to birthdays so sushi it was.

Kamil gave me an old cd that I lost. He found it somewhere or rather, the single of I Finally Found Someone by Bryan Adams and Barbra Streisand for the soundtrack of ‘The Mirror Has 2 Faces’. I was touched because it signifies that he remembers what I have to do, rebuild my cd collection again.

You guys know that we used to live with his parents right ? Well… when we moved out, we forgot about a few knick kacks here and there. While his mom returned some of the stuffs back to us, she threw my whole cd collections away. CDs that I accumulated from my England days.

Sigh. All those singles and all those one hit wonders and all those disbanded bands. Where can I get old Skunk Anansie cd here in Malaysia ?

Please, anyone has a copy of Weak by that band ? Pinjam …. !

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Karate Kid

Last night we caught the 10 o’clock show for Karate Kid.

I was quite interested to watch it because I love the Ralph Macchio/Pat Morita team and was curious to see how this one would fare.

And the verdict ? It was GREAT !

I love it ! Immensely !

It was waaayyyy better than the original.

In the original you do get frustrated with the amount and type of moves Ralph could do. By the time his tournament came around, you sweated a bit because you keep thinking, he is going to win with those moves ? Only those ? Surely Mr Miyagi could teach him more sophisticated way to kick ?

And it was huge miracle that he managed to get to the finals let alone win it.

But this one, with Mr Han replacing Mr Miyagi, there was real action. REAL ones. You got excited thinking that he was finally going to kick some butts and you know… you were more confident that he was going to win it. I mean, you know he is going to win it, yeah but I just like to feel a bit more positive for the hero.

Jade Smith is a fabulous actor. That kid is gonna go far. He looks like his dad you know. He is his dad. His face, his acting everything screams Will Smith. He is super gorgeous, you all.

The orang jahat I have to say looks like Jet Li. And he is one fine actor too. SO fine that if I ever bump him anywhere, I will definitely try to give him at least a black eye. Kasi hentak sikit.

Jackie Chan has always been my eternal favourite. When I was little, I used to watch Police Story and Drunken Master over and over again. I just can’t bear to watch him in Shanghai Night (and Noon) and in the Rush Hours though. Dunno why.

The movie is indeed fun. You will unwittingly go AUUWWW and OOFFFHHH during the fights and you will feel sad when the depressing bit gets and you will wince when the bully comes into the picture. “Run, Dre ! He is there !” you’d feel like saying.

I am just a sucker for movies like this. Like what ? Err… like this lah… !

So… what next ?

Hmmm … A-Team ?

Tuesday, June 08, 2010

My weekend

So…. My weekend huh ?

I don’t know why I keep this up since I am too busy with work… But I love blogging. I am keeping memories….

So, Friday we ate out. Dah lama tak masak since I start my new job. What to do… I mean… orang masuk keje baru selalunya boring with reading files and training but I was propelled to it straight away. Can’t remember where we went for dinner pun…

Eh… hang on.. I know what happened. Neighbour depan kawin kan anak so that night they had a doa selamat. Now I remember ! The food was delish ! It was just a small do after the akad in the morning and before the big reception on Sunday.

Had a good time eating and catching up with neighbours.

Saturday was Agong’s birthday. Happy birthday, Tuanku. We went to Ampang Park because Raya is near and I need kain for baju raya. I went to Gulati’s already but this year the designs are horrendous beyond belief. Too semak… too crowded… Too many colours in one kain.

Kamil found 1 that he like. 1 ! What I like he doesn’t. Plus their choices were limited because banyak kain dah habis and some they turned into baju kurung already so this Saturday I have to go again as new shipment of kains are coming and I can have look at them first before they start tailoring. Yeay !!!

My mom bought a jubah though.

I brought work home so did a few stuffs for an hour or two. Malam we went to Sunway Giza I think it is called because Adik so wanted to go. Well… please don’t. There is practically nothing there. It was sooo boring. I seriously don’t know what makes a good mall… I mean… I love Subang Parade when there is nothing much there either. So I can’t understand why I don’t like this Giza Mall because it definitely has more things going on than Subang Parade.

But I just don’t like it. My family don’t either so after a half-hearted look around, we went to Uptown for dinner.

He he…

Something horrible happened in Uptown.

Ha ha…

Okay… we were eating kan… Then suddenly Adik announced she needed to pee. The grown-ups of course groaned because… where is the toilet ? Is there even a toilet ? Plus the thing that went round and round my head pressingly was, “What are their conditions ?” I mean… I don’t be even dare to go there in my mind let alone actually make a physical visit ? You nuts ?

Babah told her to hold it in for just a little while and we started shoving in food. We however noticed her discomfort and out of the goodness of his heart, Kamil put down his cutleries and took her hand. I so love my husband. I could never love him any better than that very moment.

I plied him with wipes and off they went. I just received my food pun at that time and Kamil was already halfway through his so I suppose that was why he was being so generous.

Anyway Kamil came back with Adik in tow and sat down heavily. “It was horrible…” he said. He then closed his eyes and when he opened them again, it was pained. He picked up his fork, looked at his food, made a repulsed look and put down his fork.

“I tak lalu makan… I geli…..”

Oh dear. If the toilet can break down Kamil… what do you think it would do to me ?

“I think you mati kot kalau you masuk….”

There you go. Kamil said it. And you know… up until now he would’t elaborate what actually happened there…. And I am left to my imagination...

Urrgghhh !

Anyway, Sunday we went jogging while the kids were in class. Went for breakfast at our usual spot and then lunch at Dewan MBSA for the wedding reception of the pengantin depan rumah. Sweet you know… they are teachers in the same school… He he… school is the best place to find your soulmate.


Mom called to say she made nasi ayam for dinner. We were in and out of her house under half and hour as I had a lot of work to do. Report to be sent Monday morning actually…

So that was it.

Boring. No baking, no orders as I was busy. Too busy… Sigh..

Saturday, June 05, 2010

My Little Boy....

Yesterday morning I sent Abang to school quite early. It was raining heavily so I had to drive inside the school compound. Just before I stopped to let him down, he remarked that his class was empty. I looked at the watch and it was only 7.05 so I was not surprised.

Anyway, I kissed him and he closed the door to my usual last minute advice. I smiled oh-so-lovingly at him and just before I looked away, I saw that his face had turned panicky, and then saw his equally alarmed gesture for me to wait.

Rolled down the window to hear him say, “Mummy ! There is no one in my class !” Face all worried and near to tears in mere seconds.

What ? So ?

“Takpelah. Just wait at the canteen…!” I gestured frantically at the canteen where quite a number of students were milling about.

“But I don’t know them !” He was surprise, surprise crying by this time. A bit of rain was also pelting him. So it was a really wet affair I tell you.

I just can’t describe how I feel. Exasperation mixed with disbelief plus a smidgeon of pity was there somewhere too.

“Abang, there is nothing I can do about it. You just have to deal with it, okay ? I have to get to work and I don’t want to be late… Stay at the canteen where there are a lot of people !”

He didn’t want to. He was scared for some reason. For reasons that I cannot think of. He waved goodbye at me reluctantly, with face contorted in his grief or fear (you choose….), wet from the tears and the rain. When I turned around after stepping on the accelerator, he was in the rain, looking at the canteen that was devoid of his friends worriedly.

My mind was constantly filled with that image of him in the rain during the 15 minutes drive to work. I am still very much puzzled with the tears. His face was filled with so much anguished, for something that I cannot even start to think about. Many times I felt like turning around and gathers him in my arms… I felt like I have to save him for some unseen demon… but I must be strong. For my son to be strong, I have to be strong.

Kebetulan the day before I spoke to D’s mom. She informed me of Kem Solat that D will be attending during the school holidays. I was very much interested and in my mind, the decision was already made that my son is going until she mentioned that it will be a sleepover. 3 nights at that.

Hai… Kamil would not let his son to be out of his sight for 3 days. Never ever.

“Anak kita ni lembik Kamil….. Please let him go….” I tried that very night. As as I have predicted, his face was unconvinced, lips tight, eyes narrowed.

So in a way it was very fitting to see Abang cowering at the prospect of…. I dunno… being alone ? The dark sky ? (I mean I do not exactly know why he was so upset) so soon after. Knowing that menangis kat sekolah could help cement my argument, I quickly related the incident to Kamil and when I broached the subject of the camp and the word manja….he gave a sigh and said, “Entahlah…” That to me is a good sign. It was better than his silence.

Anyway malam when all of us we were watching the telly, I asked my son nicely, asking him to explain the tears. “What were you scared of ?”

“I dunno…..” he answered, voice low, eyes downcast. “I just feel scared. Maybe because it was dark. Maybe it was the lightning….. Okay maybe I over-reacted….”

He he…..

Let’s see if Kamil is going to let him join the camp. And if my son turns out to be a man who jumped at the sound of thunder… well bukan salah ibu mengandung.

Thursday, June 03, 2010

Happy birthday

Late last month was arwah Shera’s birthday.

My mind kept wandering to her last birthday party.

I remember her wearing a black blouse with her favourite pair of earings. She made carbonara that day, on account of it being Esya’s favourite.

She also served this super delicious chocolate cake. We went back the next day to eat the cake. She was sooo happy.

No… I can’t write.

I just can’t.

I miss you, sweetheart and I love you so much.

Happy birthday…

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

My weekend.... yang dah basi

Folks, I really do want to blog about my weekend but I just can’t !

I am too darn to sleepy to remember what we did let alone write it !

I am tried. This job is draining. Minus 2 days of training, 1 day of induction and Wesak holiday, I have only been working for 8 days but I felt like I have been at it for 8 years. Seriously. I am busy beyond words. Way than beyond. Beyond is a thin line from where I am standing.

Ha ha. Anyway, will attempt a brief one.

So Friday went to see Prince Of Persia. Marvellous. Prince Dastan is so monkey like, kecik hati Spiderman. Because Spiderman needed his web to hang about buildings but this guy had to rely on his agility only. Chewah.Okay maybe the buildings weren’t high at all.

Saturday balik Perak which I have blogged about. Kamil drove Hyrul’s mpv to take us there. They owner atas kapal so bini owner suruh abang ipar bawak kete dia. Muatlah all of us in the car. No need 2 cars. Good for the environment that. On the way Kamil and I agreed that our next car should be a van.

Sunday after weeping at the fact that we have only until night time to relax before we must slave away again, err…. we did nothing. We stayed home and watched the telly. Had lunch at Empire, the new spanking mall in front of Subang Parade and then balik.

You know, it amazes me that everytime a new shopping mall opens, it will be filled to the brim. And if at the same time you go to other existing malls, it will still be a tight squeeze. Nothing changes. There were no gaps anywhere to indicate that some of the crowds had taken their patronage elsewhere, leaving the older malls a bit more space. Nada. You still have to like to make 200 petrol wasting rounds around the car park for your vehicle.

So what is the use of building a new mall ? It DOESN’T ease the crowds at all. In fact it seemed to create more crowd !

So the question is, mana datang orang extra ramai-ramai ni ?

And the other question is, I thought I was too mengantuk to do this… Tapi sempat lak membebel. Old habit dies hard.