Bibik nak balik

So, referring to the above title... Bibik ku nak balik.

Actually, she had been asking to go home for quite sometime because her momma is ill. But she couldn't because there were extenuating circumstances that stopped me from sending her home. And the extenuating circumstances are not me yeah, it is her previous employer. Enough said.

Anyway... the way she said it, well ... sounded a bit final. She kept saying that she has to take care of her mom and the tone too sort of hinted that she doesn't intend to come back.

So one day while we were cleaning cabinets, I asked her what are her plans when she returns. She is basically the main bread winner, all her salary has been sent home, her children although some have grown, are in no position to support her or their grandma or their school going siblings.

She sighed and looked worried. She admitted she doesn't know what she will do. I then suggested for her to go home for a month or 2 or 3 even, get her life sorted out then come back. How is she going to eat or even buy medication for her mom if she is out of work ?

She was shocked. She asked if I am willing to wait for her that long and inquired what the arrangements for the children would be like. I told her not to worry about us but herself. I informed her that if she is serious about returning, I will take her in.

She looked relieved and instantly became her cheerful self again. She had been under dark clouds for a few months after she found out about her mom's illness so I was ecstatic to see her so happy.

Then, last month her mood was sombre again. Apalah yang jadi pulak ni. Phonecalls from Indonesia came frequently and once I heard her shouting. My kids confided in me that her youngest son has been bailing out of school and has taken upon himself to quit. Senang aje budak tu. Kalau aku dapat aku cubit.

Then, her eldest son chased the daughter that has been living in her house and taking care of the grandma, out. So now the sick mom is not being taken care of.

Pulak.

Last week she opened her heart out to me and we talked for hours. I really pity her and sangat menyampah dengan anak-anak yang tak reti nak menyenangkan mak sendiri.

Bibik is no super Bibik. Her housekeeping is so-so. Many weekends I would be scrubbing the toilet and the kitchen and a hoard of other stuffs. You know the nitty-gritty of house-cleaning, the corners that needed attention, the cobwebs, the shelves that needed wiping and dusting and the likes.

*Terkedu jap nengok video clip Terpesone Scott Hew (I think his name was ) and Syafinaz.... Aku tak tau nak kata apa...

She successfully bore holes in many, many of Kamil's work shirts. All at the cuffs. She also managed to put a tear on a lot of Kamil's t-shirts. All on the left side. Heran jugak, all Kamil's stuffs and all isolated to a certain areas... Hmmm... Sungguh musykil.

But...

She loves the kids. I saw them in a cuddle numerous times and the first thing they did when they come home from school is calling her and beaming happily at her. She would throw herself in front of them bila aku naik hantu. Everything is, "Salah Bibik ni.... Bukannya salah Abang/Adik." That never works thus she would end up standing worriedly next to me.

She voluntarily makes sure my children perform their 5 times a day.

She is a great cook. I love her masak lemak and ayam hitam. Macam makan kat Sari Ratu.

She is also my adviser. Yang akan bagi nasihat kat aku when she sees I am making a mistake. I value her advise and care. It is like having a second mother.

That is why when I asked her last Monday, "Bibik janji balik sini ya ?", her silence worries me.

"Bagi Bibik tanya budak-budak di kampung dulu ya...." Was her answer after dia termenung.

Oh dear.