Sigh...

I feel like ranting and raving today. Actually I already ranted and raved in my FB.. and to my friends… So rasa macam dah over rant and over rave pulak tiba-tiba… But…. Hmmm… masih ada saki baki yang nak dikeluarkan…. Heheh…

I was on leave since last Friday. Baru hari ni, which is a Friday I went back to the office. I did nothing but sleep, nursing my batuk induced pening-pening and tried to prepare for my kids new school year during my precious leave. So rugi to actually sakit masa cuti.

Admittedly, I wasn’t so thrilled at the prospect of returning to work. Understandable really since I have been off for a solid week. I was dragging my feet and all, dreading my arrival at the office and look at my desk, and the piles of papers that should topple over soon. But typical me, once I was there, everything was just okay. I filled my day productively and was raring to go. Penat aje building up the kemalasan ….

Eh.. I can actually rant and rave about something ! I just realised that I ranted and raved about this thing to only 2 people so far ! Tak cukup quorum nak bagi puas hati….Heheh… You get that it’s a joke, yeah ?

Anyway, bulan puasa lepas we received a missive from Abang’s school minta derma for anak-anak kurang berkemampuan (okay.. I used orang miskin before and I find that I don’t like it for some reason…) so that they can have a good raya. They named these kids, and the class they belonged to and I of course got bog down with worry for them. Worried about their persiapan sekolah for the coming year. Especially there were some Std 6 students and I know they wouldn’t be able to recycle baju tahun lepas.

I remember when I was a kid. How a new bag is important. How crisp and shiny white uniforms are important. How pristine shoes devoid of holes are important. I also remember feeling inadequate for whatever flimsy and merepek reasons. I want these kids to not feel inadequate at all. I want them to start a new schooling year with vigour and sufficiently motivated (not aiming high ..). Not worrying if people noticed their shabby clothes and bags that need to be replaced. Or be envious of the girl in front who has a new box of shiny colour pencils or fancy erasers. 

I contacted the school like 2 weeks before it re-opened. Okay, okay admittedly I should have done it earlier because when I got round to calling, I was informed that the teacher in-charge of Hal Ehwal Murid or HEM dah balik kampong.

Err… okay…. Can I at least talk to somebody who knows ? Surely there are other people who could help me ? Nope, she replied. Only the HEM knows these students. I explained that I want to take these kids to shop for stuffs. I want to let them loose and go crazy. I want them to get the things that they really wanted but couldn’t, the Hello Kitty purse or the Cars’ pencil case. Maybe a 24 pieces colour set.. Or a new funky bag. I stressed that I want to help the ones entering secondary school to really, really prepare for school.

She thanked me profusely, dengan doa-doa supaya Allah murahkan rezeki but she re-iterated that I still have to wait for the HEM and he will only be around on the 28th. I find that it is a bit too late to wait until then but there is nothing much I can do kan ? Before I hang up the phone, I asked for her name and… oh please, Ya Allah tolong lah aku… she said that she is the Headmistress.

I don’t know but my hair prickled and my breath got  bit hot and smoky. I could be wrong but I am sure since she is the Head of the school, she should have access to the files. I mean… surely she has an inkling where to look, kan ? Or at least make an effort to ask someone ?

Right ? No ?

Since this is for the kids, I am sure she could take a crack somewhere, to at least look ?

Right ? No ?

So… come the 28^th I called. Again I was given the pujian-pujian for my benevolence which sedikit pun tidak mengembangkan aku because I still have not managed to make the actual sedekah just yet. And when I was informed that the HEM was busy and was asked to go over the school which apparently is easier – for whom I have no idea, the feeling that I would not be able to help gets stronger.

Luckily HEM called and seriously I cut his pujian short. Because by that time aku punya bulu dah tumbuh berkodi-kodi when he told me that another teacher is the one who has the details and not him. I told him of my plans to take them shopping, you know in my attempt to cajole his desire to take the extra mile and get things moving, but to no avail. I was told that the person in charge (which was actually him according to the Headmistress no less) will call me back.

I despaired. It really was not a good week for me. 

Tetapi… they called me just now ! The school ! Sungguh tak disangka-sangka. She gave me 6 names and then mentioned that there are 27 Orang Asli too. 

Oh ? 

Apprently, they need books more than anything. The text books they get for free but the buku2 kerja tu. Selalunya she said, they could only produce the books in April or May… tunggu mak ayah kumpul duit. 

Pulak.

Now my plan to let the kids go crazy sounds so frivolous. Fine. So, I told her to go around and check with the 6 under privileged kids and the 27 Orang Asli kids for books that they are still without.

Maybe I should write to the PIBG and ask them how they spend the yuran that we pay every year.

Sigh…. Another letter to write.